


Baby You're A Rich Man (But A Lonely One Too)

by DemonDean10



Category: The Beatles (Band)
Genre: ALL THESE ISSUES ARE DISCUSSED, Age Difference, Alternative Universe - Mafia, Apologies, Assassin Linda, Assassin Yoko, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, BDSM, Blowjobs, Crossdressing, Dark, Drugs, First Time, Fluff, Forced Oral Sex, Hate to Love, Hostage Situations, M/M, Medicine, Mental Health Issues, Mob boss Brian Epstein, Mobster Bob Dylan, Not by Brian, Pet Names, Peter Brown sucks, Slow Burn, Sugar Baby John, alternative universe, bad uses of these things, good uses of these things, kidnappings, not really - Freeform, sorta - Freeform, this is dark, yeah i know
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-14
Updated: 2019-04-28
Packaged: 2020-01-13 09:54:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 21,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18466567
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DemonDean10/pseuds/DemonDean10
Summary: Warning: This is kinda dark sooooo if you're like eeehhh don't read. It's not super dark and thereis nothing graphic but mobsters are here so!Allen Klen and Phil Spector own a great debt to Don Epstein, head of the Epstein mafioso family.  With no way to get the money, they decide him back with another type of currency.John Lennon was a student at the Liverpool Art College, that is until he was kidnapped and gifted to a mob boss.Brian Epstein expected a new toy and got John Lennon instead, a snarky and biting young man.This couldn't possibly become a love story.Also O'Boogie the cat just wants to sleep.





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings:
> 
> -Kidnapping  
> -Forced blowjobs  
> -Attempted Rape (Not by Brian)  
> -Talks of suicide
> 
> If you're cautious about the content or think you might be triggered, please don't read this. McLennon will be back soon.

The two men stared at the young man, waiting for his friends to retreat. The student was dressed in tight jeans, drainies, a large and old looking black coat with a wide collar raised to cover his neck, a long scarf around his neck, and sported a pair of thick rimmed glasses. He was talking to a group of friends and smoking a cigarette. Soon his friends would head in the opposite direction and he’d be defenseless.

 

The two men were Phil Spector and Allen Klein, drug dealers with a debt in their shoulders and a target on their backs. They owned heavy money to Don Brian, head of the Epstein mob family. They had no money left and no ways to get it without getting more in debt, and so it had come to this. It was well known that Don Epstein had a taste for young men and this ‘Lennon’ boy from the art college would do. They had always seen him walking home alone, distracted and gazing at the ground, the idea hadn’t been difficult to reach.

 

Finally, the three young men departed and Lennon turned around as he lighted another cigarette. He picked up a guitar case from the ground and started walking. 

 

Klein started the van and they got going, following the young student for a couple blocks. Lennon turned into an alleyway and he stopped the van. Klein turned to his partner, “Get going now.” 

 

Spector sighed and got off the van, quietly following the young man. 

 

Lennon stopped to put off his cigarette and that’s when Spector pounced. 

 

He grabbed the boy by the neck and covered his mouth with a rag.

 

John’s eyes widened as he was grabbed and he dropped his guitar gaze. He struggled but the arms around him were strong and tight. The rag covering his mouth and nose smelled odd and soon he felt his eyes closing and his body weakening.

 

Soon, everything went dark.

 

* * *

 

John woke up in the back of a shaking van. He’d lost his glasses and squinted around himself. A piece of tape covered his mouth, his hands were tied behind his back, and his ankles were tied together as well. His coat was missing, leaving him only in his tight white t-shirt. John started to panic, struggling in his bonds. What the hell had happened? Who had kidnapped him? This didn’t happen to him.

 

Someone kicked his back, “Stop that, boy!” 

 

John looked up and flinched as he saw the barrel of a gun, a frowning man on the other end of it.

 

What the hell was going on?

 

* * *

 

Brian was called from his work by his right hand man, Peter Brown, knocking on his door. He looked up from his generals’ reports with a raised eyebrow, “Yes?”

 

Brown smirked, “Spector and Klein are here.”

 

Brian chuckled with incredulity, “What? Do they want us to kill them?”

 

“Klein says he’s got payment.” Brown told him.

 

“Nonsense.” Said Brian, “They have no money.”

 

Brown’s smirk was cruel, “It’s not money.”

 

Recognizing the look on his friend’s face, Brian grinned. “Oh?”

 

They two headed down the ample stairs of Epstein Manor, chatting about a shipment of methamphetamine that was being delayed by weather. Once they reached the landing the two spotted Klein and Spector standing there, nervous at the guards with guns standing around them.

 

Epstein looked at them, “You have tired of running, I see.”

 

Klein took a deep breath, “Yes, Don Epstein.”

 

Brian walked close, his designer shoes clicking on the marble floor. “I hear you have a gift for me.”

 

Klein dared to smile, “Yes, sir. He’s in the van.”

 

Gesturing to his guards to retrieve the gift, Brian headed into the living room and everyone followed. He headed to his drink cabinet and took out a bottle of brandy. “Will you indulge me in a drink, gentlemen?”

 

Klein and Spector eagerly nodded.

 

After delivering the drinks, Brian sat down on the brown leather sofa and crossed his legs. After taking a sip of his whiskey, he said, “So where did you find him?” It was clear to whom he referred.

 

Spector spoke up, “Boy goes to art college, Lennon’s his name.”

 

Brian nodded thoughtfully, it looked as though he’d be getting an artist.

 

In that moment his guards walked in with a struggling young man in their arms. They dragged him to the middle of the room and forced him to kneel.

 

Brian stood up with excitement and walked close. 

 

The boy was squinting up and looking widely around the room. His hair looked wild but surely it had been carefully styled before.

 

Brian admired his gift. The man had a firm chin, an aquiline nose, and eyes a lovely brown colour. Manly looking enough for Brian’s tastes but with a fine waist and protruding hips. He was dressed like Teddy Boy, that would surely be something interesting to explore.

 

The boy was glaring up at him, but his breathing was fast and panicked.

 

Brian offered a cold smile and took ahold of his face, moving it around to better examine it.

 

Klein was holding his breath, hoping his payment was to Don Epstein’s taste.

 

Finally, Epstein looked up and let go of the boy’s face. “Take him to my room.” He told his guards, “And don’t damage him.” He warned.

 

The boy’s eyes widened at his words and he struggled fiercely as he was dragged away, growling behind the tape covering his mouth.

 

Brian turned to his debtors, rejoicing in their nerves. “A fine payment.” He said.

 

Klein and Spector smiled.

 

Epstein continued, “Still, thousands were owned. I don’t even know if the boy will be any good.”

 

Klein bowed, “Please, Don Epstein. We’ll do anything.”

 

Brian felt merciful, happy in the knowledge he had someone new to warm his bed. The last boy had met a regretful ending, having hanged himself in Brian’s closet. “Very well.” He said, “I will take all your profits for the next year.”

 

Spector gaped, “But how are we supposed to live!?”

 

Seeing the dark look in Epstein’s eyes, Klein was quick to speak up. “That’s just fine, Don Epstein, sir. We are thankful for your mercy.”

 

Brian offered a thin smile in return.

 

* * *

 

John kicked and screamed behind the tape as he was dragged up a curled staircase, frightened by that man’s words. Is that why he’d been kidnapped? Was this some sort of sex ring?

 

One of the huge henchmen holding him opened a tall oak door and dragged him inside with the aid of his pal.

 

John squinted and tried to make sense of the room. From what he could see, it was very red and very bare. He was taken towards the bed and thrown upon it. His hands and legs were untied, but before he could act his hands were grabbed and raised to the headboard. With a gasp, he saw that there were handcuffs connected to the oak wall, and soon the leather cuffs were around his wrists. He hissed as the duct tape was removed, but he had little time to stretch his mouth before a ball gag was shoved in.

 

John curled up his legs, scared that the henchmen might try to take his clothes away. But they did no such thing, they just chuckled at him and walked away.

 

After the door banged shut, John stared up at the ceiling, panting and frowning. After a few minutes of contemplation and fright, he decided to sit up. Shifting in the admittedly soft bed, John raised himself up and rested his back against the headboard. With his arms held open against the wood, he started to look around.

 

The room was covered in finery, red velvet drapes covering tall windows. An enormous chandelier hung from the ceiling and lamps were located around the room. The floor was black marble and very clean. There were paintings on the walls and John’s eyes widened as he recognized some from pictures at the art college. Were they originals? There were also tall bookshelves around the room, but he noticed that they were rather empty. 

 

The bed was draped in a red velvet comforter that matched the drapes, but had only one fat pillow. Two oak doors could be seen from the bed, surely leading to the loo and closet.

 

Overall, while the room was beautiful, it looked empty and unloved. There were no photographs, no clothes on sight, no open books or notebooks. Very different from John’s bedroom...which he would probably never see again.

 

The young man was shaken out of his thoughts by the door opening and he pulled against the cuffs in reflex. 

 

Brian walked into the bedroom, stopping in the doorway to look at the young man tied to his bed. Yes, they would have some fun. But first, it would be bad manners if he fucked the boy before being properly introduced.

 

John glared as the man got closer, clenching his fists.

 

Brian stopped as he reached the bed and moved to remove the ball gag, ceasing his movements as the boy flinched away. “Now now, darling. I’m just trying to take this off.”

 

John just growled.

 

Brian smiled and went to take the gag off anyways, chuckling as the boy tried to bite him once it was off. “Ohoho, feisty!”

 

John spat at him, “Fuck you.”

 

Brian smirked and squeezed the other’s thigh, “Don’t worry, that will come later.”

 

John swallowed.

 

Brian grabbed a comfortable chair and sat down next to the bed, appraising the young student in front of him. He took out a cigar and lit it up. “So your name is Lennon?”

 

John gaped, “How the hell do you know that?”

 

Brian shrugged, “I have my ways. But I’m guessing there’s a first name in front?”

 

John refused to answer.

 

Brian just took a drag of his cigar. “I’m guessing, then.” He sighed, “Michael?” Nothing. “Adam? James? Edward? John?” He smirked as the boys eyes flickered up to him. There it was. “John. John Lennon. It suits you.”

 

John clenched his fists, “Sod off.”

 

“I’m afraid I cannot, you  _ are _ in my bed.” Brian said.

 

John squirmed. “What’s your name then?” He barked.

 

Brian blew smoke out, making the boy cough. “Don Epstein, Brian.” With a hand on the young man’s knee he said’ “‘Sir’ to you.”

 

John huffed out a laugh, “Yeah, I don’t think so.”

 

Brian’s eyes were cold, “Remember Johnny,” He murmured, “You’re mine now. My pet to do with as I please, and I can get rid of you as easily as I got you. Understand?”

 

John, always the fearless rebel, said, “Sure, Brian.” Of course inside he was afraid, but damn him if this bastard got to know that.

 

The monster only chuckled and stood up, “I think that’s enough talk for now.”

 

John smirked at his back, “What, did I bore you?”

 

Brian started to take off his suit jacket, “Oh, not at all.” He said, “I’m just looking for another form of entertainment from you.”

 

John froze and stared at the man. He forced out words, “I’m no queer.”

 

Brian laughed, “Oh, I’m sure.” He had removed his shirt and was taking off his belt. It had been some time since he’d last gotten off, this feisty student surely would be a delight.

 

John tried to move his legs but the older man was quick to grab them, reaching up to unbutton his trousers. John tried to move away but failed, restrained as he was. “He-ey, get off!”

 

Brian ignored him and started to take off the tight drainies, eyes glinting as the boy’s thighs appeared. Fuck, they were  _ divine _ . 

 

John did not appreciate the look the mobster was giving him, and he kicked up into the other’s chest, “I said, get off!”

 

Epstein was quick to move and grasp the other’s cheeks, squeezing them tightly. “You want the gag again?”

 

John glared at him. 

 

Brian let go, “I thought so.” He took ahold of those thighs and spread them. He wouldn’t fuck the boy properly yet, no. He wanted to take his time with this one, make sure the younger man would scream his name. Basing off his attitude this one would surely deny him any such sounds until he got used to being Brian’s pet.

 

John squirmed as he was dragged from his sitting position to lie down and the man got on top of him. 

 

Brian looked down at John, eyes lustful. 

 

John closed his own.

 

Slowly, Brian began to rub their pricks against each other, grinding his hips down.

 

John’s willed himself to not get aroused but his body did not listen. Soon enough his cock was forming a tent in his boxers. 

 

Brian groaned as he moved, focusing only in his own pleasure. This John, like all his past ones, was a mere toy. It was the way Brian worked and the way things would remain. 

 

John held back any sounds, refusing to give the man that satisfaction. Even when he came into his pants, no sound left him. Brian, on the other hand, groaned right in his ear as he climaxed, covering them both in his seed. 

 

The mobster looked down at his boy, slightly disappointed. John had done nothing Brian’s hand couldn’t do. Still, it was his first day, he would improve. At least Brian hoped, it would be a shame to have to get rid of such a pretty face.

 

He unlocked one of the boy’s hands and turned him on his side. They would clean up tomorrow. 

 

John winced as the man touched him and turned him on his side. At first he almost expect to be spooned, but the mobster moved to the other side of the bed clearly not interested. 

 

“Night, John.” Came Brian’s voice, cold. “We’ll chat more tomorrow.” And that was that, he turned off his lamp and went quiet.

 

John didn’t even get inside the sheets. It took a long time before sleep claimed him, and when it did it was not a peaceful one.

 

* * *

 

John was woken up roughly and he startled, pulling on the leather cuff around his right wrist. 

 

It wasn’t Brian, it was the cruel looking man who’d been by his side when John had been dragged into the living room of the house. 

 

John squinted up at him, the night before coming back to him.

 

Brown stared down at the boy, admiring his physique. Boy, Brian has gotten a good one this time. He went to unlock the cuff, “Don Epstein prepared some clothes for you.”

 

John sat up slowly, rubbing his sore wrist. “What?”

 

Brown moved away and pointed at a dressing screen. A pair of loose white trousers looking shiny and smooth, along with a black, see-through button up shirt with white polka dots, and a sleeveless white coat. Overall, not John’s style at all.

 

Seeing the young man frowned at the clothes, Brown smirked, “Brian won’t have what’s his dressed in rags.”

 

John sat up, “I’m not a thing.” 

 

Brown didn’t answer. 

 

John looked down and blushed as he spotted his soiled pants, no wonder the other man was so smug looking. Gingerly, he grabbed one of the white sheets and dragged it up and around him to cover himself up. 

 

Brown smirked and nodded at the dressing screen, “Go get dressed.”

 

John stood up, “I need the loo first.”

 

Brown sighed, “It’s that door.”

 

John didn’t thank him, only walked. 

 

The bathroom was fucking gorgeous, it almost made John gag. There was even more marble in here and almost everything was bathed in gold. The tub was enormous and was that a jacuzzi? Marveled, John did his business and cursed as he noticed that he’d forgotten to bring the clothes in. Ando so out he went, still covering himself with the sheet (he’d left the pants and t shirt behind on the bathroom, wanted to dirty the spotless room) and behind the screen. 

 

He grabbed the clothes and frowned down at them. Sure they were soft, but John wouldn’t be caught dead wearing something so...so queer. He looked down at his sheet covered bare body and sighed. He was about to speak but froze as he looked up.

 

Peter Brown was there, behind the screen, looking at John.

 

The student held the sheet higher, “What do you want?”

 

Brown stepped closer, crowding John against the screen. He raised his hands and ran it down the other’s arm.

 

John tried to move away but found he couldn’t do much without risking losing the sheet. “Oi, get away.”

 

Brown took a hold of the sheet from where it covered John’s left shoulder, “Aren’t you a pretty little thing?” He dragged the sheet down and exposed the pale skin.

 

John grew angry, he was not about to let himself be violated twice in less that 24 hours, and so he steeled himself and smashed his forehead against the other man’s.

 

Brown stumbled back and John started to run away, but the older man took ahold of the sheet and made him slip.

 

John gasped as he went down and the tall man got on top of him. He struggled to keep the sheet up and forced the man off him at the same time.

 

But soon Brown had succeeded in removing the sheet almost completely, exposing John chest which was rapidly rising and falling.

 

John’s hands were up in the other’s face, scratching at Brown’s eyes.

 

Their struggle was interrupted by the door opening. A small, Asian woman walked in. Her eyebrows raised as she took in the scene. 

 

Brown took her in and moved off John with a sigh.

 

John was quick to sit up and take ahold of the sheet again. 

 

The Asian woman stared at Peter with calculating eyes, “The Don is calling for you.”

 

Brown nodded and with a final smirk at the shaking young man on the floor, went out the door.

 

Then the woman’s eyes turned to John, who also felt compelled to stand up, adjusting the sheet around his body.

 

She sighed, “He is waiting for you too, you better get dressed.”

 

Feeling angry at his situation, John frowned, “I can’t wear those clothes.”

 

She looked down and for the first time John noticed that she was holding a bundle. “I figured you might say that. Here,” she said, “your trousers from yesterday and a shirt.”

 

John felt himself offer a small smile and he grabbed the clothes. “Ta.”

 

She nodded at him, “I am Ono.”

 

John nodded, “John.” He said, “What are you, an assistant?” He asked this as he moved behind the screen.

 

Her voice was amused as she answered, “No.” She Answered. “An assassin.”

 

John froze behind the screen and choked on air. 

 

Ono stirred him, “Are you finished? The Don doesn’t like to wait.”

 

The man was quick to dress, happy that the blue shirt fit him well. He got out from behind the screen and offered a weary smile, “Lead the way?”

 

* * *

 

John was taken to a wide dining room painted a rich green. Around a long rectangular table there sat Epstein at the head with Brown sitting next to him, smirking at John. There was an empty space on Brian’s other side. Also on the table was another woman, a blonde young looking girl examining John with cold eyes and a tall, thin man holding a wine glass.

 

Ono took a seat next to him and pointed John towards the seat next to Brian. After a moment's hesitation, John moved to where he was indicated.

 

Brian didn’t look at him when he spoke, “You took your time.”

 

John stabbed at his fat pancake, “Maybe I would have been quicker if your man hadn’t jumped at me.” He expected the mob boss to be mad, but instead Brian laughed.

 

Brain shook his head Peter, “You can never control yourself, can you? You’ll frighten the poor lad.”

 

Peter shrugged, “What can I say? You should pick less attractive ones if you don’t want me to sneak a touch.”

 

John frowned at the two of them. This freak had been about to rape John and they were laughing about it?

 

Epstein turned to John and his brows furrowed slightly, “Why are you not wearing the clothes I picked for you?”

 

John ate a bite of his pancake and shrugged, “Not my style, are they?”

 

The man’s grip on his fork tightened slightly and he let out a breath. His tone was carefully controlled, “Well, you can’t wear those clothes forever, lad. And I won’t have what’s mine dressed in rags.” He’d repeated Brown’s words from earlier, clearly this was something he’d mentioned before.

 

John glared at him, “Well it’s a good thing I’m not yours, isn’t it?”

 

Brian’s smile was thin, “Then I’ll be sure to claim you later tonight, eh?”

 

That shut John up.

 

The conversation went on for a few more minutes, and it wasn’t until someone mentioned pills that John perked. He’d forgotten, with all the shit going on, that he was, in fact, mentally ill.

 

He raised his head, “I need my meds.” He declared.

 

The table quieted and the tall man frowned at him, “Meds?”

 

John rolled his eyes, “Yeah, I need them.” At their looks, he sighed and went on to explain in a tired tone, “I have depression and suffer from a case of bipolar disorder, I need meds to live properly without incident.” The words he’d learned as a teenager and were still greatly needed today.

 

Brown scoffed, “Great, they brought you a damaged one boss.”

 

John’s gaze turned fiery and he nearly bent the fork with his anger. John wasn’t  _ damaged,  _ he was just...how did the line go? Endowed with more difficulties?

 

But Epstein surprised him, “What are they? The meds?”

 

John stared at him for a moment before answering. It was an answer that he’d memorized recently since his doctor had changed his meds. “Symbyax is the brand, it’s a mix of fluoxetine and olanzapine. Eskalith is lithium carbonate and Prozac is fluoxetine.”

 

Epstein nodded shortly and snapped his fingers, two of his henchmen moved immediately and went out the door. He turned to John, “I’ll make sure they bring a good supply.”

 

John wasn’t sure how to feel, so he just nodded. This Don Epstein really did change his attitude every five minutes, first he laughed at John being assaulted then he got him his meds with no question.

 

Shortly after, breakfast was over and Brian nodded at Ono, who was quick to tap at John and nod at him to move.

 

John huffed but stood up and followed her upstairs. Brian said nothing to him.

 

She opened the oak door for him and John stepped in. He was about to speak when she closed it and he heard the lock being turned. Confused, he went to it and knocked harshly on it, “Hey, what the hell?”

 

“Don Epstein doesn’t need you at the moment.” Her soft voice said from the other side of the door, “I suggest you find some way to entertain yourself.”

 

John sighed and moved away from the door. And to think he’d thought she was nice.

 

Squinting, he looked around the room and after a few moments walked towards the bookcases. Looking around for a familiar title or at least something that looked interesting, he found only encyclopedias, a dictionary, and a Torah. Great. Sighing, he picked up the encyclopedia with the letter J. He went to the bed and opened the book. Groaning, he discovered that the font was incredibly small and he would be unable to read it without his glasses. Since there were no pictures, he just banged it shut and pushed it away. 

 

Intentionally ignoring the leather cuffs he’d been tied to earlier, John curled himself up in the warm bed and hugged the pillow close. Damn, he missed his cat.

 

* * *

 

John was awoken by the door opening, and he was quick to sit up. Three henchmen entered, carrying a crate each. John frowned at them.

 

The tallest one spoke up, “Your medications.” And they put the crates down.

 

John gaped at them and walked close, kneeling by one of the crates and opening it. He gasped, that was a supply for years!

 

The henchman frowned at him, “Is this what you wanted?”

 

John nodded incredulously, “Yes, I...where did you-no, don’t tell me.” This was a mob, after all.

 

A maid walked in after them, holding a tray and a bag of clothes under her arm. She put the tray on the bed and the clothes next to it.

 

The henchman nodded at the clothes, “Boss insists you wear that for tonight.”

 

John narrowed his eyes, “What’s tonight?”

 

The man shrugged, “Boss just said he was looking forward to it.” Then he and his men left.

 

John sighed after them and opened the other crates. He took out the boxes and bottles needed for a week then took out three pills. In the tray there was a glass of water and he took them down with that. The tray also had a small steak with mashed potatoes and vegetables. Against his will, John’s mouth watered. His broke ass ate half cooked macaroni, old pizza, and ramen almost every day. This? This was heavenly. 

 

After his meal, John took a look at the bundle of clothes. He opened the bag and took out the outfit. In shock, he dropped it. It was lingerie, fucking lingerie. Black and lacy like a model might wear. There was even a damn corset!

 

Well if this Epstein expected John to wear this he had another thing coming. He put the thing back in the bag and threw it at the ground. Whatever Brian wanted for him, he’d get no help from John.

 

* * *

 

Brian rubbed a hand through his face as he read a report. 72 pounds of cocaine had gone missing from their latest shipment and there were no leads. Their supply of coke had always been low and now this would be another hit. 

 

Sighing, he decided to leave it be for now and head to bed. Smirking, he stood up. The lingerie he’d sent for the boy to wear had been a test, one he was sure he’d failed. Surely, he would walk into his room and find the boy fuming at the gesture, dressed in his ugly and old rags. 

 

And so it was, John was pacing the length of the room, looking like a caged animal. He stopped when Brian entered.

 

Epstein smirked, “Didn’t like my gift then?”

 

John glared at him and said nothing.

 

Brian sighed and started to remove his tie, “I actually believed you would be grateful after I supplied your medicines.”

 

John huffed, “The ones you stole, you mean?”

 

Brian turned his cold eyes to him, “I could take them away.” He said, “I’ve always been fascinated by bipolarity, perhaps you would be interesting to observe.”

 

John was disgusted and his face showed it.

 

Brian laughed, “I didn’t think so.” He went into his closet, “Moving on, don’t think you will be able to pull that stunt from today again. You will wear what I chose or nothing at all.”

 

John laughed, “Really?”

 

Brian’s voice was serious, “Really.” He came out of the closet dressed in silk pajamas and stared at his pet. “There are night clothes here, you are welcome to them.” Then he walked towards the beg, sighing at its messy state.

 

After a moment of hesitation, John walked towards the closet. He could sleep comfortably in his jeans for a whole night and it was better to wear the man’s pajamas than nothing at all.

 

He picked the cheapest looking ones, a flannel combo the colour of daisies. The were big on him and didn’t button up properly, but they felt soft and used and that was enough. 

 

He came out of the closet to find Brian sipping a glass of scotch, sitting up in the bed. It was an oddly twisted  domestic sight. John stood up front of the bed, wary.

 

Epstein snapped his fingers and pointed to his side.

 

Huffing, John moved to climb the bed and sat himself as far away from the man as he could. 

 

Brian laughed at him, “You can relax, pet. I don’t plan on doing anything tonight.”

 

John scowled, “I’m not a pet.”

 

Brian just hummed and turned another page in his book. “You can read something if you don’t plan to sleep.”

 

John scoffed, “I can’t read without my glasses.”

 

Brian shrugged, “Then sleep.”

 

John flipped him the finger before laying down and facing away from him, curled up tightly.

 

* * *

 

John was awoken by a hand running up his leg. The light in the room said it was morning. He started and tried to pull away but found his right hand cuffed to the bed again. John bit back a groan as his prick was grabbed and Epstein started to stroke it.

 

Brian was panting in his ear, rubbing his aching cock against the boy’s backside.

 

Again, John kept silent and maintained his eyes screwed shut. He bit his tongue as he came and winced as his captor spilled all over his flannel pajamas.

 

And once Brian rolled away and stood up, John curled himself up. His wrist was unlocked and he brought it close to his chest.

 

Brian sighed at his pet, “I won’t need you today, do as you wish.”

 

John’s voice was tired and cold, “There’s nothing to do in this fucking room.”

 

Epstein squeezed his curled up leg, “You’re a smart boy, I’m sure you will figure something out.”

 

And John tried. He had wanted to remain in his pajamas, but dirty as they were, he wasn’t comfortable with it. So he went into the closet and looked around. Everything looked expensive and worth more than John’s life.

 

In the end he settled for another pair of pajamas, refusing of wear anything else of Epstein’s.

 

He walked around the bedroom afterwards and examined the windows. They were tall and almost reached the ceiling, with the heavy drapes covering them. John looked out of one and whined in the back of his throat. The room was...high, high off the ground. No way he could jump or climb down, if the windows even opened. 

 

Sighing, he went and sat in a chair. He was determined to stay away from the bed, not wanting to think at what would probably happen there later. 

 

He sat and wished he had his guitar, it had probably been stolen by some criminal by now. John looked around maybe a paper and pen so he could draw, but there was nothing to the found. He resigned himself to a day of boredom and brought his knees up to his chest, hugging them close.

 

John wanted to go home.

 

His breakfast was brought up soon after, eggs and bacon this time, and he ate it with little enthusiasm. 

 

He took his meds and stared out the window. As far as he could see the house was surrounded by forest, trees green and tall.

 

John looked around the room, who hung anyone would show up. He hated being alone, even a henchman would do.

 

He paced around the empty room, desperate for anything to do. 

 

After minutes and minutes of his restless actions, John was practically shaking. He  _ needed _ something to do. He would go mad otherwise.

 

* * *

 

Brian walked into his room and froze. Chairs were overthrown, books scattered, his pillow was destroyed, and one of the drapes had been nearly ripped from its hinges above the window. 

 

He looked around slowly, his anger growing by the second. He spotted the boy on the floor next to the bed, curled up in ball. Furious, he hurried to his side and grabbed him by the hair.

 

John shrieked as his hair was grabbed and he was dragged to the center of the room.

 

Brian lifted him up and shook him, “What the hell is  _ this _ ?” He turned John to face the room, “What the fuck is  _ wrong _ with you?”

 

John kicked at him, voice broken. “Well what did you expect, you bastard?” He let out a small sob, “You lock me up here with  _ nothing _ to do! Use me like a toy then keep me here, what did you expect me to do!? I was suffocating in this fucking room!” He was shaking, limp in Epstein’s hold. “What did you expect me to do…” He whispered.

 

Shocked, Brian let him fall to the floor. Staring at the broken boy sobbing in front of him, he stepped back. 

 

John sniffed and looked up, eyes red.

 

The mob boss looked away from that suffering gaze. Turning away, he hurried to leave the room. He would spend the night elsewhere, away from his guilt.

 

* * *

 

John did not sleep that night, and as it bled into morning he was still left alone. The room was destroyed and he was in pieces. He hadn’t had a breakdown in years now, but there he was, destroying the rooms. He was certain to be killed now. But he did not move from his position on the carpet next to the bed. Let Epstein kill him if he wished...better than rape him.

 

It was nearing noon when the door opened. John didn’t perk up. 

 

Brian, dressed in a crisp suit he had in another room, walked in with three henchmen on tow.

 

John buried his face on the carpet, this was it. All those years of battling his depression, of pills and therapy and hospitals...this is how he was going to die, killed by the mafia. It was almost funny.

 

But he was surprised as the tall henchman from yesterday walked close to him and deposited something by his feet. John frowned and raised his head, then gasped. It was O’Boogie! His lovely fat cat. His friend ran up into his arms as John cooed at him. 

 

The other henchmen were holding stuff too, which they left on the desk. John’s extra pair of thick rimmed glasses, three books he knew he had left on his bedside table, and his old notebook with some new looking colour pencils. They also left O’Boogie’s tattered bed next to the table, along with his bowls and a small bag of food. A much better quality food than John had ever been able to afford.

 

Smiling slightly at John’s mystified look, Brian said, “Here, now you won’t feel the need to destroy my bedroom for entertainment.”

 

John blushed but bit back anyways, “You deserved it.”

 

Brian gave him a warning look then sighed and started to walk away, “Evans will help you clean up.”

 

The tall henchman nodded at John.

 

Epstein kept going, “I expect you’ll be grateful tonight.”

 

John looked down, so much for that. Still, at least he could distract himself from the sex now. 

 

And Brian left.

 

John turned to Evans, “Thanks for getting my cat.”

 

The man gave a friendly smile, “Oh, ma pleasure, sir.” He said, “Name’s Mal.”

 

John nodded, “I’m John.” He scratched his cat’s head, “And this little shit is O’Boogie.”

 

Mal laughed, “Good name.”

 

John laughed too.

 

Then they started to clean up.

 

* * *

 

The next time Brian walked into his bedroom, it was cleaned up and John was curled up in one of the small sofas, talking quietly to his cat. The mob boss buried a smile, telling himself that he’d gotten the boy’s things from his (frankly sad) flat so that he’d calm down and improve as a lover. He started to remove his tie and cleared his throat. 

 

John looked up from O’Boogie and sighed quietly. Rubbing at his nose, he stood up and left him there on the coach, looking royal. Knowing it was best to be good for Epstein tonight, John walked towards the bed and removed his glasses. 

 

Brian did smile at this and removed his belt. Seeing John about to lie down, he spoke up, “Not just yet, pet. I want you in your knees tonight.”

 

John froze for a moment and coughed, “I-I don’t…” Well, technically he did. Had. One time as a teenager when he was in need of bus money. 

 

Brian raised an eyebrow, “Are you not grateful?” The boy had been indulged, now it was time for him to do his job. 

 

John looked at his cat. Yes, he was thankful. He’d be more thankful if the man released him but...that would never happen. Clenching his fists, John slowly got on his knees. Unable to resist a quip, he said, “Hope you clean down there.”

 

Brian huffed as he unbuttoned his trousers and got in front of the young man, “Don’t be cheeky.”

 

John dared to smirk, “Sure, Brian.” But his smile fell as the man’s cock was revealed, hard and long. His mouth suddenly felt dry. 

 

Brian, in a moment of compassion, said, “Just relax. It’s not hard.”

 

John didn’t believe him, but nodded anyways. Part of him felt uncomfortable with his cat being in the room while he was on his knees sucking this man’s cock, but the other part was happy that once this was over he could go and hug O’Boogie close. 

 

Gingerly, John started to lean forwards and timidly darted his tongue out to lick at the tip. Then, with a look upwards, he started to lick at the sides, wincing at the taste. 

 

Brian put a hand on his head, “That’s it. Come on, pet, take it in.”

 

After a brief sigh, John gave up and took the cock in his mouth. It felt large and heavy, assaulting John’s senses. He hummed slightly and adjusted himself. 

 

Brian was feeling a little impatient now, “Well, hurry up, boy!”

 

John glared upwards but did as he was told. He started to gobble up and down, struggling to fit the thing in his mouth. John choked as Brian thrusted into him and he raised his hands to grasp at the other’s legs.

  
  


Epstein tugged at his hair, “Use your tongue.”

 

John swirled it around, humming as he did so. He wasn’t hating this as much as was expected but still, when he tried to move away slightly Brian held on tightly to his hair.

 

“You’re not going anywhere, pet.” His words were accompanied by a thrust.

 

John’s eyes watered as he choked once more but he blinked rapidly. Glaring up at the mobster, he bit down on the cock.

 

To his surprise, this made Brian moan rather than hiss and the man held him even closer to his pubic hair.

 

John’s nose wrinkled but he continued his ministrations, letting his eyes meet Brian’s lust filled ones.

 

With a final thrust, Brian came and spilled into John’s mouth.

 

John refused to swallow and spit out the cum once he was released. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, “How was that?” His voice was rough.

 

Brian shrugged, “You have much to learn.” Was all he said.

 

John scoffed as he stood up, “That’s it?”

 

The other man laid down on the bed, “That’s it.”

 

John glared but followed him into the bed. O’Boogie scurried up and snuggled close to him.

 

Brian tutted, “No animals in the bed.”

 

John held his car close, “He won’t bother you.”

 

Sighing, the mob boss turned away, deciding it wasn’t worth an argument.

 

John didn’t close his eyes yet, “Am I going to wake up cuffed tomorrow?”

 

There was a pause, then-

 

“No.”

 

John decided to believe him, and fell asleep soon after.

 

* * *

 

It had been a week since John had been kidnapped, a week since he’d become Don Epstein’s pet. Apart from their nightly activities, he didn’t see much from the man. He hadn’t been taken out of the room at all, all of his meals were brought to him. He was getting tired of the same four walls surrounding him but Mal came to visit him many times and Ono did as well. He drew and read and pet O’Boogie. 

 

Every night Epstein had had him give him a blow job, ‘Practice makes perfect’ he said. John had even swallowed twice now. But he didn’t like it much, he got no pleasure from it and he certainly didn’t get off. But he preferred it to when Brian grabbed him and rubbed himself until he came. Still determined to not enjoy it or make any effort during those, it made John feel like a sex toy. Which, he supposed, Epstein saw him as.

 

He wondered about his friends at home and about his band. Paul would be worried sick as well as Stu. Ringo and George would be worried as well, hopefully. But they would move on.

He worried about Mimi, without him she was alone and much like him, she hated being alone.

 

Currently he was reading Alice In Wonderland, something which never failed to lift his spirits. He raised his head and looked out the window, wouldn’t it be perfect if he could escape like Alice did?

 

* * *

 

Brian Epstein was not in a good mood. He’d come to the docks to talk with his supplier of meth and the man was late. He was also stressing over the missing cocaine, but that was another matter entirely.

 

Mal Evans shifted nervously beside him, “You sure it was a good idea to come here yourself, boss?” He was holding his gun tightly, “Brown could have handled it.”

 

Brian scoffed, “Sullivan is nothing to be afraid of, Evans. He’s worked for me for many years.”

 

Mal doubted this, but said no more.

 

Half an hour passed and Brian was beyond impatient now. He was pacing a small circle, itching for someone to blame. Well, Sullivan would surely get it when he did arrive.

 

Mal had a bad feeling, the situation wasn’t looking good at all. He looked around the warehouse, feeling as though they were being watched. He stopped at one of the dark corners, thinking he saw something move. He heard a small ‘tink’ and then something rolled out from the corner. He moved backwards.

 

Brian was distracted from his pacing by Evans dragging his arm. 

 

“Boss-!” The cry was interrupted by an explosion.

 

* * *

 

John was looking at the grandfather clock with confusion. It was eleven now, and Brian was still not back. He was usually in the bedroom by ten at the latest. 

 

The student was reclining on the bed, drawing little caricatures of the people he’d met recently. Mal was huge but his smile was bigger. Ono was tiny but had big eyes. Brian was drawn to look ugly, with a pointy nose and evil smile. Sure, he’d brought John his cat and his meds, but John refused to be flattered. Brian was holding John captive and assaulted him every night. He put on a brave face, but he couldn’t take it for much longer. He missed his family, his friends, even college, he missed his life.

 

He perked up as he heard fast and heavy footsteps nearing the door and flinched as it was slammed open. He gasped as Brian came into view.

 

The older man had lost his suit jacket and his white shirt was covered in blood and grime. He was holding his right arm, which was seeping blood from some sort of wound. There was a gash on his head and his hair was marred with the red substance too.

 

The sight made John sick.

 

Ignoring the boy, Brian went to the table and opened one of the drawers, slamming it shut once he had the first aid kit. With a shaking hand, he opened it. The two had been ambushed, Sullivan nowhere to be seen. A dozen men had come out with guns blazing, and Brian had been hit on his right arm. But the two of them weren’t amateurs, and with guns and in Brian’s case knives, they had killed nine of the men. Two had escaped and one had been captured. He would be interrogating that little slug tomorrow. But first he had to clean all his wounds and make sure he didn’t die of an infection or some other nonsense. 

 

Quietly, John watched Brian try and clean his face but his left hand had a gash and his right arm didn’t allow him to raise his hand enough to reach it. Sighing, he stood up and walked closer with a little fear. Carefully, he went to reach for the wipe.

 

In his anger and shame, Brian slapped his hand away rather harshly.

 

Groaning quietly, John tried again.

 

Brian shoved him with his whole body now, “Fuck off!”

 

John glared at him and huffed, “Listen, you shit, you’re bleeding out and can’t treat this yourself. Let me help.”

 

Brian stared up at him with irritated eyes.

 

After a few moments of silence John raised his eyebrows, “Well?”

 

Brian sighed and offered the wipe.

 

John took it and began to work. He cleaned the blood away diligently and carefully, taking a hold of Brian’s chin to better work.

 

Brian kept quiet during this and hissed only slightly when John applied alcohol to the wound. 

 

John grimaced, “Sorry.” He finished cleaning the face and threw out the wipes. He looked down at the other’s chest, the shirt was covered in blood. He looked up at Brian, “We need to take off your shirt.”

 

Brian went to do it but gasped as his left hand pulsed and his right arm burned.

 

John rolled his eyes and went to do it for him. It was difficult but soon the button up was gone. Carelessly, John threw it on the floor and winced at the sight of the mobster’s wounds. He started with the slashed around the front, cleaning and disinfecting with precision. Then he kneeled down to better clean the wounded arm. 

 

“The bullet is out.” Brian said, “But you’ll need to stitch it up.”

 

John looked up at him, “I don’t know-“

 

“I’ll lead you, don’t worry.” Epstein said.

 

John sighed and got back to cleaning out all the blood. “So what happened? Who did this?”

 

Brian let out a breath, “My meth supplier. He had men ambush me and Evans at the warehouse we were supposed to meet at”

 

John looked up with alarm, “Is Mal okay?”

 

Brian nodded tiredly, “Yes.”

 

John returned to his work. He smirked slightly, “I’m guessing the men who ambushed you aren’t.”

 

Brian laughed, “No, we took care of them.” He looked to the floor, “Still, two escaped.”

 

Noticing the forlorn tone, John shrugged, “You can’t win all fights.”

 

Brian looked at him, “Guess not.”

 

John smiled thinly and stood up, “So I just...sew you up? Like clothing?”

 

Brian grimaced, “Something like that, make sure the needle is clean.”

 

John got it out of a special packet. The took the thread and prepared.

 

Once the boy was kneeling next to his arm again, Brian started to instruct him.

 

John listened carefully and made sure his fingers were steady as he fixed Brian up. Instinctively, he cooed as Brian hissed and winced. Finally, he was done and could cut the thread. He smiled up at Brian, proud.

 

The mob boss found himself smiling back. 

 

John stood up again, “Now give me your hand.”

 

Once the hand was clean and bandaged, the two of them stared at each other for a few moments. 

 

Brian cleared his throat, “Thank you.”

 

John shrugged, “Well…” He wanted to say something snarky, but instead felt inclined to say a simple ‘You’re welcome’ instead.

 

Brian stood up and stared at the young man. He truly was a good one.

 

John narrowed his eyes, “What?”

 

Brian didn’t answer. He just leaned close and went to kiss him.

 

But John, seeing this, shifted his head away. “Please, don’t.” He whispered.

 

Epstein stopped, “What’s wrong, pet?”

 

John wanted to cry. Instead he just put down the bandages and stepped away. 

 

Brian grabbed his arm, “John?”

 

The student pulled away, “Listen, I may be your...your pet.” He said, “But I’m not your boyfriend.” He glared up, “You don’t get to kiss me.”

 

The fierceness with which he said this brought Brian pause. He looked down, “Very well.”

 

John turned away and went in the restroom to wash the blood off his hands.

 

Neither slept well that night.

 

* * *

 

Days passed and John saw Epstein even less. The man was very busy with the ambush situation and whenever he did come back to his bedroom John was usually already sleeping and he was too tired to wake him up and do something.

 

John was overjoyed, it had been three days of him not having to suck cock or endure Brian wanking him. His mood was lighter as a result and his appetite returned.

 

That is until he got a visitor.

 

Peter Brown looked just as slimy as he had the last time John had seen him. He was wearing an ugly brown suit with a sweat coloured shirt. 

 

John held O’Boogie closer to his body. “Why are you here?”

 

Brown stared at the boy reclining on the large beg, mentally undressing him, “I heard you’ve been lonely.”

 

John shifted under the intense gaze, “Not really.”

 

Brown laughed and moved closer, “Now, now. You don’t have to lie to me, baby.”

 

John moved farther up the bed, “Don’t call me that.”

 

“Why not, baby?” Brown asked as he reached the bed.

 

O’Boogie left John’s arms and so the young man grabbed a pillow instead, he needed something to squeeze. “Fuck off, pervert.”

 

Brown frowned and was quick to grab a hold of the boy’s leg, nails biting into the pajama clothes skin. “That’s not very nice.”

 

John tried to pull away and he struck the other’s shoulder, “Leave me alone!”

 

Brown dragged John closer by the leg and grabbed the arm that had hit him, “Oh no, baby. Brian’s been neglecting you, I’m here to make it all better.”

 

John kept on struggling, his breathing getting harsher. “No- let go of me!”

 

Brown grabbed his other wrist and raised them to the headboard. He let go of the left one so he could cuff the right one. 

 

John kicked at him, his heel getting on the other’s eye and making him cry out. He pulled at the cuff, but the leather did not give away. 

 

Brown glared, angry now. He got on top of the man and backhanded him, leaving John slightly dizzy. 

 

John yelled as his other wrist was grabbed and also cuffed, “Help!  _ Brian _ !”

 

Brown chuckled at him, “Oh, he won’t come, baby. He never has before.” He moved his hands to the waistband on the pajama trousers and slipped a hand inside. He chortled and whistled, “No underwear, huh?”

 

John pulled at the cuffs desperately. Of course he didn’t have underwear, none was provided for him and he had refused to wear Epstein’s. He cried out again, calling for help.

 

Downstairs, in Brian’s office, the mob boss was discussing business and plans for payback with three of his generals when Mal Evans entered the room, looking distressed. 

 

“Sir,” He started, “Brown is in your room, John is calling for help.”

 

Brian was quiet for a few seconds. His feelings were baffled. There was jealousy that Brown was getting it in with his new toy, amusement at his friends antics, but also...a certain fear or anger. And not because John was his, because Brown had taken advantage of plenty of his lovers before, but because it was John that was crying out for help. Still, “And?” Epstein raised an eyebrow.

 

Mal frowned in confusion, “Should we not do something?”

 

Brian forced himself to remain expressionless, “Why deny the man his pleasure?” He looked at the papers in front of him, “John is no different from any of the others.”

 

Mal looked down. The others, six since he’d started working for Epstein. They had all cried for help more than once, and Evans had listened with pity. But he’d done nothing, still a junior man. And now John, who was nice and not afraid of Mal, was the one in need. He cleared his throat, “Very well, boss.”

 

Brian offered a cold smile, “Is that it, Evans?”

 

Mal nodded towards the floor, “Yes, sir.”

 

Back in the room, John was close to tears and still screaming for someone, anyone to show up. “Please, help! Brian, Mal!” He was trying to hit Brown with his knees, “Let go of me, you motherfucker!”

 

Brown was irritated now. With a huff he moved away slightly and went to open Epstein’s drawer. He took out the gag and moved back, “Alright, you can shut up now.”

 

John tried to pull away as Brown moved closer, “Get back, you  _ beast _ ! Please, he-!” The gag had been shoved in. John sobbed and closed his eyes tightly, wishing that it was all a nightmare. That he would wake up and Brown would be gone. He whimpered as his trousers were removed and his legs spread roughly, shaking his head. 

 

Brown was in the middle of removing his own suit pants when the door was slammed open. He jumped and looked towards the doorway. 

 

Mal Evans stood there, shaking with adrenaline and anger. He pointed at Brown, “You, out!”

 

Brown stood up and laughed incredulously, “Excuse me?”

 

Evans moved his large body close, eyes fierce. “You heard me, get the fuck outta here.”

 

Brown huffed, “The boss will hear of this.”

 

Mal cracked his knuckles, “Tell him. But first, leave.”

 

Brown took one last look at his denied prize and walked away, intimidated by the henchman. 

 

Once the slimy man was gone, Mal breathed out a sigh of relief and went to the bed. He looked at the tied up man with pity, thankful he’d gotten there before anything horrible occurred. 

 

John jumped away from his touch, eyes still tightly shut. 

 

Mal moved away and instead went to unlock the cuffs, “Hey, it’s alright. It’s me, Mal.” He uncuffed the right one first, then the left. 

 

John took his wrists and held them close to himself, curling up into a ball. 

 

Mal knelt on the bed, keeping a respectable distance. “Here,” He said, “Let me get rid of that gag, okay?”

 

John, with shaking hands, reached up and unlocked it himself. Throwing it in the henchman’s general direction, he then buried his face in the duvet and sobbed, tears like currents falling from his eyes. 

 

Mal didn’t know what to do, “Do you, do you want me to get you some clothes?”

 

John didn’t answer right away. When he did it was just a brief nod almost hidden from view.

 

Mal went into Brian’s closet and grabbed a pair of silk pajamas, unknowingly picking the ones Brian wore almost every night. He brought them back to John and left them beside him. “I’ll, I’ll draw you a bath, yeah?” He walked towards the bathroom. 

 

A weak voice stopped him. “Thank you, Mal.” Said John from his curled up position. 

 

Mal turned and offered a warm smile, “Of course, John. I just wish I had gotten here earlier.”

 

John said nothing. 

 

* * *

 

Brian paused before he entered the room, thinking about what he would find there. Brown had interrupted his meeting earlier, raging about Evans interrupted him and ‘the brat’ as his right hand man had put it. Brian had been surprised that Mal had acted against Brian’s orders, but not terribly mad about it. In fact, there was almost a thankfulness in him, a relief. Brian did not understand it, he’d never cared about what Brown (or others) did to his pets. It wasn’t something he allowed himself to think much upon. The boys he kept were sex toys, nothing more. Yet John, John made him want to reconsider such an idea. 

 

Sighing, he opened the door and walked into the room, his eyes searching for the student. He found John away from the bed, curled up in the carpet in front of the small fireplace reading his well read copy of ‘Alice in Wonderland.’ Brian did not miss the wince John made as he heard the door opening. 

 

Brian cleared his throat, “How are you?”

 

He got a quiet scoff in return. 

 

The mobster sighed and went to change into his sleep clothes, realizing as he walked into his closet that John was wearing the ones he normally wore. He went back out and bit his lip, decided to get closer to the young man and talk. But when he reached down hand to touch John’s shoulder, the younger man flinched away.

 

John cowered. “Please,” He whispered, “Not tonight.”

 

Brian frowned, “I wasn’t planning on doing anything.”

 

John sighed like he didn’t believe him and shifted away from him. “Then could you leave me be?”

 

Brian nodded gingerly, “Alright then, I’ll be in the bed.” And he walked away, leaving the young student in peace.

 

John spoke up in a soft voice, “Brian?”

 

The mobster paused beside his side of the bed and looked at the boy, “Yes?”

 

John’s smile was weak and broken, but it was there. “Thank you for sending Mal. He saved me.”

 

Brian’s throat constricted. How could he reveal that he’d in fact planned to let Brown have his way? That he had abandoned the boy like he had many others. Instead Brian hummed at him, “Of course.” He smirked playfully, “Can’t let others have what is mine.”

 

But to his confusion, this made John’s smile to vanish and his expression to go blank. He saw as the boy curled up again and picked up his book without another word.

 

Brian frowned to himself, had he said something wrong?

 

* * *

 

“He wants me to what?”

 

Mal shrugged slightly, “Tea.” He said, “The boss wants you to have tea with him.”

 

John frowned from the sofa, “You mean...outside this room?”

 

Mal smiles, “Outside in the patio.”

 

John felt wary but also excited. Since that first day when he’d gone down to have breakfast, he hadn’t left the bedroom at all. It had been three days since Brown had tried to, to rape him and John needed to get out. 

 

Still, he frowned, “He wants me to wear something, doesn’t he?”

 

Mal bit his lip, “Um, yes.” He held up clothes in a bag, “He got this made especially for you. By a tailor, I mean.”

 

John rolled his eyes, tempted to refuse the offer but then he looked around himself, at the once grand room turned small and sad, and decided he couldn’t refuse. He stood up and sighed, “Alright then.”

 

* * *

 

Brian took a drag of his cigar as he waited for John to arrive. He tapped the wooden box on the table in front of him, a gift for John. The young man had been quiet, cautious, and kept himself away from Brian. Three days it had been and Brian had kept his distance, last night he had tried to start something but John had flinched away violently and run away to hide in the bathroom for hours. So Epstein would try and cheer him up today, that way the boy could move on. He told himself that it really was that simple and that he was doing it so that he could get his toy back. There was a voice in the back of his mind that told that was utter bullshit, but Brian ignored it. 

 

It was then that Mal opened the white, ornate doors and walked out into the patio with John. Brian inhaled deeply. 

 

The clothes he’d had made for John fit him perfectly, despite Brian having to guess at the measurements. The suit was a blinding white, with matching white leather dress shoes. The shirt in particular fit John, a white lace blouse that clung to his body. 

 

John squinted in the room, taking a deep breath of fresh air for the first time in a long time. 

 

Brian stood up when John reached the table and smiled what he thought was a friendly smile. 

 

John saw a grimace and raised an eyebrow in return. 

 

Epstein moved to hold open John’s chair, “Please.” He said. 

 

John sat down, crossing his legs afterwards. He let Brian push the chair in and then asked, “So what have I done to deserve this adventure?” His tone was mordant.

 

The mob boss took a puff of his cigar and gestured at the maid to serve the tea, “I just thought you might benefit from the fresh air. It would do you good to open a window up there, stand on the balcony.”

 

John frowned, “There’s a balcony?”

 

Epstein chuckled, “Of course, the window left of the fireplace opens up.”

 

The student grabbed his cup, “You’d let me open it, then?”

 

“Obviously.” Said Brian, “Just be careful that cat of yours doesn’t jump out.”

 

John took a harsh bite of his biscuit, “His name is O’Boogie.”

 

In a forcibly nicer tone, Brian asked, “How long have you had him?”

 

“Two years.” Said John with a soft smile at his teacup. “My aunt bought him for me when I moved out.”

 

Brian found he enjoyed looking at that smile, “You are close to her?”

 

“Very.” John said. He didn’t quite understand why he was so willing to share, perhaps it was because it had been too long since he’d had a normal conversation that wasn’t about sex or pain. “She raised me.”

 

Brian hummed into his cup of tea.

 

John looked at him, “Who raised you? Were your parents in the mafia?”

 

Brian chuckled in amusement, “The Epstein Family has been an influential part of Liverpool for many years.”

 

“So yes.”

 

“Yes.”

 

John whistled, “Where are they now?”

 

Brian swallowed his tea tersely, “Dead.” He said. “A car accident, if you can believe that.”

 

John grabbed another biscuit, thinking. “Me mum was run over by a car.” He told the mobster. “A drunk policeman did her in.”

 

Brian offered a sympathetic look, “My condolences.”

 

The younger man only shrugged.

 

“And your father?” Epstein dared to ask.

 

John let out a sardonic laugh, “Oh, the bastard fucked off to New Zealand long ago. Left when I was five and never looked back.”

 

With such a broken home, it was no surprise the boy had so many issues. Deciding to move on, Brian racked his brain for another topic. “You’re in art college, then?”

 

John raised his eyebrows, “I was, before your men kidnapped me.”

 

Brian raised a hand, “They’re not my men. They just owed me a great deal of money.”

 

“You often take young men instead of money as payment?” John smirked at him, “It’s a wonder  _ you’re _ not in debt.”

 

Epstein looked at him, “Not that young.” He said, “How old are you?”

 

“Twenty-one.” John said with no hesitation. “You?”

 

Brian looked at his teacup, “Thirty-three.”

 

John just grabbed another biscuit. 

 

Sighing, Brian tried again. “Do you like it there? The college?”

 

John shrugged, “Well enough, I suppose. The teachers hate me and my art, have tried to have me expelled loads of times.”

 

Brian frowned, “Why?”

 

Sighing, the young man raised his hands and made quotations with his fingers. “Because I’m a ‘Disruptive Influence’ and a ‘Hazard to Professors.’”

 

Brian surprised himself with a laugh, “‘Hazard’ eh?”

 

John scoffed, “You set a chair in fire once and they treat you like a criminal.”

 

Brian choked on his tea, “I’m sorry?”

 

John smirked and offered him a goofy smile, “You heard me. Fuckin’ Professor Dippit, more like Dipshit.”

 

The two shared a friendly smile, until John cleared his throat and looked away into the garden. “It’s very pretty, this place.”

 

Brian looked around with thoughtful eyes, “I suppose, yes.” He saw a longing in the younger man’s eyes and his brows furrowed. “Would you”- He coughed - “Would you like to have a walk? There’s a pond not far from here, maybe you’d like to...feed the ducks?” 

 

John’s head snapped up at him, “Really?”

 

Brian nodded, “If you’d like.”

 

But suddenly John’s eyes narrowed, “Why?”

 

Epstein frowned, “Why what?”

 

“Why are you being so nice?”

 

The first thought that came to Brian’s head was that he wanted to get his cock sucked, but he quickly realized that it wasn’t quite true. With shame, he thought about the boy crying out as Brown tried to have his way with him and thought about how he had been willing to do nothing. He thought about John thanking him with a broken smile, and felt a cruel guilt form inside him. In truth, he wanted to be deserving of that smile, of those words. He shook his head, “I’m not a monster, John.”

 

John scoffed and took another sip of his tea. 

 

Brian sat up straighter, “I’m not.” He insisted.

 

“Could’ve fool me.”

 

Epstein slammed his cup down, making the boy flinch. “Perhaps you would like me to lock you up again? I am trying to make you happy, don’t be ungrateful.”

 

John just shook his head and smiled a sad smile. “There it is.” He shrugged.

 

Breathing rattled, Brian stood up and snapped his fingers at Mal, who’d been on the other side of the door. “Take the boy back to the room.” 

 

Mal grimaced at the ground but nodded, “Yes, boss.” He went to touch John but the man stood up on his own and raised a hand. 

 

Brian stopped them as they reached the doorway, “And take the cat.” If John insisted on him being a monster, Brian had little problem with being one.

 

John’s eyes widened and he turned around, “ _ What _ ?”

 

Mal frowned, “Boss-”

 

“Enough!” Brian slapped the table, making some biscuits fall out of their plate. “Question me again, Evans, and see what happens.”

 

Mal sighed but submitted. He took a hold of John’s arm and started to lead him away. 

 

John struggled, “No, wait- Mal!”

 

Servants stared at the bodyguard led the struggling man away. Mal sighed, “Look, I’m sorry. Just calm down.” He reached the bedroom and opened the door. 

 

John ripped his arm away and ran to where O’Boogie was sleeping on the pillow. He held him close and shook his head, “Please, Mal. Please don’t take him.”

 

The bodyguard felt for him, he truly did. But when Don Epstein was angry with his men, they usually ended up dead. What would his wife do then? He walked towards the man, “Look, I’ll try to get him back to you, okay?”

 

John went to a corner and huddle there, protecting the nervous O’Boogie with his arms. “Please.” He begged, “Don’t take him, he’s the only thing I have left.”

 

Mal grabbed the cat and tried to get him out from John’s tight grip, “This is temporary. You’ll get him back, I promise.”

 

John tugged back, “Mal, let him go!”

 

But the henchman was much stronger and soon O’Boogie was wretched away from John, who tried to get him back. Painfully, Mal held the cat way above their heads and started to walk away. 

 

John chased him, jumping and hitting at him. “No!” He cried, “Give him back, Mal.  _ Give me my friend back _ !”

 

But soon Evans was out of the room and the door was slammed shut beside him. John banged against it, desperate. “NO!” He screamed. He kept hitting and screaming at the door, but it soon became apparent that no reply was forthcoming. Sobbing, John fell to the floor. Poor O’Boogie...what was going to happen to him now? He was a completely domesticated cat, if he was left on the streets he would probably cause fights with feral cats, starve, and get run over. John had to find a way to get him back , a way to persuade Epstein…

 

* * *

 

By the time Brian got to his room he had had more than a few drinks and felt like he was about to pass out. He stumbled a few times before he reached his door, unlocked it, and got in. Immediately, he was baffled by the sight in front of him. 

 

The drapes had been pulled back, allowing the strong moonlight to light up the room while keeping a certain darkness present. The bedside lamp was on and that’s when Brian spotted the figure on the bed. 

 

It was John, laying on the bed in an open and vulnerable position. He sat up slowly as the he heard Brian. 

 

The man’s breath caught. John was wearing the lingerie, corset and all. The black looked wonderful on his skin and his thighs stood out on the little outfit. 

 

John smirked at him with hooded eyes and spread his legs deliberately slowly, “Hello, sir.”

 

The mob boss blinked, “J-John?”

 

Groggily, the boy nodded. He stood up and nearly stumbled, but managed to catch himself in time. Earlier, after he’d gotten dressed in the outfit, he had decided to only way to get through this was to finish Epstein’s two bottles of scotch. And if he’d only taken his pills a half an hour earlier, well, who was to tell? 

 

Brian ranked his tired eyes over the young man’s figure and felt himself hardening. 

 

John reached him and steadied himself with a hand on Brian’s shoulder. He leaned forwards and grinned, “Do you, do you like it?” He looked over the other’s shoulder and grimaced in pain, wanting to clutch at his stomach.

 

Brian put his arms around the other’s waist, mostly on autopilot. “Oh yes, pet.”

 

John led him towards the bed, almost slipping in the silk stockings but playing it out as if he’d intended to fall and have Epstein catch him. He forced out a giggle even as his head started to hurt, “Aren’t I clumsy?”

 

Brian smiled and picked him up, attempting to be charming. 

 

Instead, John’s stomach did a swoop and he nearly vomited into his mouth. He let himself be carried to the bed and hissed slightly as he was dropped on it. 

 

Brian heard nothing and crawled over the man, “You look gorgeous.” He whispered hungrily. He buried his face on the other’s neck.

 

John didn’t answer, his body overcome by pain. He held back a yelp as his chest started to hurt and instead let out a gasp that would surely be interpreted as pleasure. 

 

Encouraged, Epstein continued to suck at his neck. 

 

John didn’t even feel it anymore. His vision started to black out and he fought to stay awake, he had to do this for O’Boogie! He couldn’t pass out…

 

* * *

 

The next time John awoke it was to a strange beeping noise. It took a few tries for his eyes to open and they soon closed again after they did. He groaned quietly, feeling tired and pained. 

 

Ono’s familiar voice reached him, “You’re awake.”

 

John opened his eyes and spotted her figure to his left. He wasn’t in Brian’s bedroom but he was clearly still in the manor. The room was only slightly smaller and coloured a sapphire blue instead of red. A machine was beside him and there was an IV in his arm. He tried to speak but found his throat dry. 

 

She grabbed a glass with a long straw and helped him take a few drops. “How’s that?”

 

He smiled a confused smile. “Ta.” His voice was still weak. “Wha..what happened?”

 

She stared at him, “You passed out on the boss.” She said, “Then you started to convulse. Medicine and alcohol, huh?”

 

John closed his eyes, trying to think. Yes, he had known that drinking the alcohol so soon after his medication wouldn’t be good, but he had needed to get his friend back. He dressed up for Brian then...that’s when it all went blank. He noticed that Ono was giving him an odd look, calculating and wary. He frowned, “What?”

 

She crossed her legs and raised an eyebrow. “You’re the first,” She said, “The first one he’s ever tried to get back.”

 

John’s frowned turned deeper, “What does that mean?”

 

“You died, Lennon.” She said, “Your heart stopped, but Epstein called his doctor, his personal doctor, and had him get you back.” Ono’s eyes were confused, “He didn’t do that for the others.”

 

“Others?”

 

Ono smiled coolly, “What do you think happened to all his other lovers?” She asked. “He wasn’t as kind to them as he’s been to you.”

 

John scoffed, “He hasn’t been kind at all.”

 

“Exactly.”

 

The young man looked at himself, about to say a sad comment about how he wouldn’t have minded if Brian left him where he was going but he was distracted by a furry shape at the end of his bed. He gasped and tried to sit up, “O’Boogie?”

 

Ono went to grab the cat for him, “Yes. He hasn’t left your side.”

 

John buried his head in his cats fur as soon as he had him in his arms. The cat mewed and John cooed, “You’re back, O’Boogie, don’t worry.”

 

Ono hid a smile. “I’ll go call the boss.”

 

John’s head snapped up, “Wait, don’t.”

 

“He’ll want to see you.” Ono told him.

 

“Well I don’t wanna see him.”

 

She sighed, “He called the doctor to save your life.”

 

John laughed incredulously, “Are you kidding me? He’s the fucking reason I nearly died in the first place.” He lied back down with his cat in arms, “I bet he just did it so I could go back to sucking his cock.”

 

Ono didn’t say anything. She took one last look at him and walked away. 

 

John curled on his side, petting O’Boogie still. He had no desire to see that monster again. 

 

* * *

 

Still, it was an hour or two later that the door opened and Brian walked in with a doctor in tow. Epstein was dressed smartly, a striped blue suit and matching fedora. John wanted to roll his eyes, who wore a fedora inside?

 

The doctor walked to John’s side and started to examine him quietly. 

 

Epstein offered a thin smile, “How are you, John?”

 

The student didn’t answer. 

 

Sighing, Brian stepped closer and offered a wooden box, “Here.”

 

John’s eyes were distrustful, “What is that?”

 

“A gift.” Said Brian, “To, uh, apologize. Apologize for how I have been treating you, I’ve been cruel.” The words were carefully rehearsed. 

 

John hummed disbelievingly but he took the box over. He nearly dropped it when he opened it and gaped. Inside was a necklace, but not any necklace. Covered in glinting diamonds, it was thick with three layers, a large green stone hanging from each one. 

 

Smiling at the boy’s stupefied face, Brian cleared his throat. “I thought you might like to wear it tonight. That is, if you’d like to join me for dinner.”

 

John didn’t take his eyes of the glinting gems, “Will it be like last time?”

 

Brian looked down, “No.” He said, “I, I lost my temper. I’m sorry, it won’t happen again.”

 

John finally looked up. Sporting a carefully unemotional mask, he said, “Alright, then. I’ll wear it tonight.”

 

And Brian felt his heart skip a beat. “Um, by the way, this room is yours now.” Smooth.

 

John’s eyes widened, “You mean-?”

 

“This is your space.” Brian told him, “I brought all your things from my bedroom.”

 

John wanted to question him but figured it was best to not look a gift horse in the mouth. He just looked around, “And does this one have a balcony?”

 

“A larger one, even.” The Don told him. 

 

John grinned, “Good.”

 

* * *

 

Later that day, John was getting into his clothes when Mal opened the door slightly after a brief knock. 

 

“John?” Mal called out, “Could I come in?”

 

“Yes, actually I need you help.” John said as he came out from behind the screen, holding the back of his black blouse. The outfit was all black tonight, with the blouse’s sleeves being see-through and it having a lacy bow attached to the collar. Even John had to admit that he looked good, and the clothes were so comfortable and soft and actually fit him, unlike his clearance bin usuals. He came to stand in front of the tall man and turned around, “Could you zip me up?”

 

“Of course.” Mal said and did as told.

 

John offered a quick smile in thanks and went to the white vanity found on the left of the fireplace, which was also white. That was the room’s colour scheme, white and sapphire. He opened the wooden box he’d left there and picked up the necklace. “Could you help me with this, too?”

 

Mal moved close, “Yes.” He took ahold of the necklace and put it around the boy’s neck. “Listen, John. I just wanted to apologize-”

 

“Mal, stop.” John shook his head and rolled his eyes. “You were just following orders, it’s Epstein who is at fault.” He turned around and raised his eyebrows, “How does it look?” The thing sure was heavy.

 

Mal smiled warmly, “Fantastic.” The Peridot green gems contrasted beautifully with the all black outfit, nevermind the diamonds. 

 

John hummed and touched the necklace carefully, “It better.” If he was going to dress up like a doll for Epstein, then he might as well be a pretty one.

 

Mal opened the door for him, “He’s not all bad, y’know. The boss.”

 

John gave a final kiss to O’Boogie’s head and started to leave, “I think that’s for me to decide.”

 

The henchman sighed but nodded, he supposed the boy was right. 

 

* * *

 

John walked into that same room where he’d had breakfast that one time, but this time there were only two places in the large table. Epstein was seated on one end, dressed in a different navy blue suit than the one from this morning. He was smoking a cigar and smiled at John when he entered. Gesturing to the chair being held open by Mal, he said, “Please.”

 

John sat down, nodding at the maid holding a bottle of red wine. 

 

Brian spoke up, “The peridots look marvelous on you.”

 

John looked at the necklace, “Oh, is that what they are?”

 

“Quite. It, eh, belonged to my mother actually. But she never wore it much.” Brian took a sip of his drink. 

 

John frowned at the table and hesitated before saying, “So, I assume it’s part of a set?”

 

Brian looked away from where the cook was bring the food out. “What?”

 

“A set.” John said in a forcibly careless tone, “Y’know, with”- He coughed- “Matching earrings and maybe a, a bracelet.” Fucking hell, what was he doing?

 

Brian raised an intrigued eyebrow, “Yes, actually.” He tilted his head, “Why?”

 

John shrugged and looked at his salad, “No reason.”

 

Brian ate a small tomato and dared to speak, “I saw that your ears are pierced.”

 

John laughed, “Uh, yeah. I lost a dare with my friend Cynthia one time and I just...decided to keep them, y’know.” They didn’t really go with the Teddy Boy look so he mostly wore earrings when he was just alone, but sometimes he snuck in a little thing on just one ear. 

 

“I could, if you want that is, get you the earrings too.” Brian grinned, “They would fit you well. Along with the ring and bracelet, of course.”

 

John thought to himself. Would he want that? He’d never really had the chance to enjoy jewelry before, in the fear of being seen as queer, so perhaps he could take advantage of his situation in this small way. He looked up confidently, “Yeah, I’d like that.”

 

Brian nodded with a smile, “Consider it done.”

 

They were served the main dish then, roasted chicken with warm potatoes on the side. John took in the smell and his mouth watered, he dug in with gusto. 

 

Brian chuckled in amusement, “Good?”

 

John nodded enthusiastically, “ _ Yes _ . I’ve not had roasted chicken in years.”

 

They ate in silence, John too focused on the food to say much. Finally, it was time for desert. The chef brought out a cart with many different pastries and bowls and brought it to John. 

 

“What would you like, monsieur?” The small man asked with a large smile.

 

John’s eyes stared at all the foods with disbelief. There was ice cream, cakes, biscuits, gelatine, all sorts of things. He looked up at Brian, “I can have anything?” His voice was that of an excited child. 

 

Brian smiled indulgently, “Anything at all.”

 

John turned the chef, who grinned at him knowingly, and giggled. He grabbed chocolate cake slice and a bowl of a green ice cream. Then, with a red face, grabbed a plate of little fluffy biscuits. “Merci.” He said to the chef. 

 

The chef laughed and moved away, “Bon appetit.”

 

Brian selected a slice of vanilla cake with cream on top. 

 

John ate his deserts happily. It had been months since he had had enough money to get himself such a treat, apart from a really bad milkshake that one time. He was so content that his weight never even crossed his mind. 

 

Brian found himself actually happy that the boy was enjoying the food, regretting now that he hadn’t had desert send up to the room before. 

 

Feeling eyes on him, John looked up and beamed at him, eyes twinkling. Maybe Mal was right, and Epstein wasn’t so bad. At least when it came to material things. 

 

* * *

 

“I hope you had a pleasant time tonight.” Brian said as they went up the stairs. 

 

John shrugged one arm, “Better than any recent once.” Feeling the need to be more generous, he added, “Thank you for the food, I, I haven’t had food as delicious in years.”

 

They stopped outside John’s door, “If you’ll allow me, I would like this to become a, a more common occurrence. I’m afraid I’m too busy to have dinner with you every night, but when I have time-”

 

“I’d like that.” John interrupted. He leaned against the door, “But why?” Before Brian could answer, John continued. “Why did you give me a room? Why get me the necklace? Why did you save my life?”

 

Brian looked at the ground and shook his head. “Because...because when I saw you convulsing on the ground, dying due to things I put you through-”

 

“It wasn’t like that.” John said, “I mean, I didn’t do it to kill myself. Not really. I was just, just careless.”

 

Brian looked at him, “Even so. It was then that I realized...you’re not a pet. You’re human. And I have been horrible to you.”

 

John tensed and swallowed before he asked, “Then why not let me go?”

 

“Because I am not a good man, I am selfish.” Brian answered. “Because I still want you, but I want you to want me as well. I want you here, but I want you happy.”

 

John nodded, understanding. It wasn’t ideal, he’d rather go back home and go back to his friends. But there was nothing to do but accept Epstein’s deal. “Alright then.” A part of him wanted to ask about Brown, ask if he was still around, but he decided he might not like the answer so he just opened the door and gave a thin smile, “Goodnight.” But his hand was grabbed before he could go in. His voice was taken by what Brian did next. 

 

The older man raised the hand to his lips and, tenderly, kissed each finger. He looked up with hooded eyes, “I’ll have the jewelry delivered tomorrow.” His voice was a whisper.

 

John couldn’t answer, he only nodded shakily. 

 

And then Epstein was gone, walking further down the hallway into his bedroom. 

 

John entered his room, closed the door, and leaned upon in deep in thought. He looked around the grand room he was given, looked at the glinting chandelier in the ceiling, and the four poster bed with a million pillows. O’Boogie was sleeping in one of the pillows, clearly enjoying the change from John’s mangled couch at home. He sighed and reached up to take off the necklace and slipped his feet off the slightly heeled short boots. He walked towards the bed after leaving the gems on the vanity, taking off his belt as he did so. 

 

John pet O’Boogie, thinking about his life in the future. He decided, yawning as he shrugged out of the blouse, that as long as Epstein remained as he’d been tonight, polite and considering, John would be his best. He might still sass the man and insult him, but John did that with everybody. Brian should consider himself lucky. 

 

Slipping off the dress trousers, John buried himself in the sheets and blankets, snuggling his head close to cat. “Goodnight, O’Boogie.”

 

The cat mewed.


	2. CHAPITRE DEUX

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lalalalalalalalalalalallalalalalalalallalalalalallalallalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalallalalalalalalalal
> 
>  
> 
> behold, my first symphony.

The next day John woke up to a few knocks on the door. He sat up and stretched, “Come in.” It seemed too early for breakfast and he just wanted to sleep for ten more hours. The night before was still heavy in his mind, Brian’s words running through his thoughts. 

 

Mal walked in with one of his men, leather boxes and cases in hand. “The boss sent this for ye.”

 

John blinked his eyes, “The earrings?”

 

Mal chuckled, “Oh, I reckon there’s more than earrings here.” He put the boxes down on a side table with his man doing the same.

 

John felt excited, even as he reproached himself for it. He stood, keeping himself covered by the bedsheets. He walked towards the boxes and grabbed a smallish leather case. He gasped as he opened it, it had a ruby necklace inside(with its proper earrings.)

 

Grinning unconsciously, he started to look through the other bags and boxes. There were dozens of gem sparkled necklaces, shiny bracelets, big and small rings, long and short earrings, diamond encrusted watches, and diadems. John even saw what looked like a small crown. Brian had sent all this for him? 

 

Mal whistled in appreciation, “Would you look at that.” He said, “I don’t think anyone’s worn them in years, not since Madame Epstein.”

 

John looked up with wide eyes, “They’re beautiful.” He gushed, “I can wear them all?”

 

The man nodded, “Boss insisted, cleaned out his wardrobe.”

 

John looked down at a pearl necklace in his hand with a soft smile.

 

Mal started to leave, “Your breakfast should be up soon.”

 

John nodded, “Thanks, Mal.” He adjusted the sheet and put down the necklace. He went to where his pajamas were folded, he could really use some clothes.

 

* * *

 

It was half an hour after he’d had his breakfast, eggs with beans today, that Mal walked in once again. A tall man with a refined suit followed him, a suitcase in hand. 

 

John looked up from his book, “What’s going on?”

 

Mal smiled to calm him down, “This is Mr. Sal, Don Brian’s tailor.” He chuckled, “Boss said you need more clothes.”

 

John agreed, but he frowned. “His style?” He asked in a tired tone.

 

Mal shrugged, “I’m afraid so.”

 

John sighed but he stood up. If Brian wanted to give him more things, John would take them. Queer clothes or not, the man couldn’t live in pajamas.

 

The tailor came and went. He complimented John’s figure and said he would look ‘marvelous’ in white, black, and surprisingly, red. John had just nodded along, not entirely comfortable with all the touches. As he left, the man informed John that the clothes would take a few days to be finished but that he and his people would work diligently. John had answered that he didn’t really care.

 

John was having dinner now, thinking about home. He thought about Paul, and how he’d never hear him sing again. He’d never hear George’s genius guitar licks, or see another of Stu’s paintings. Ringo wouldn’t make him laugh again and Cynthia wouldn’t hug him anymore. He wouldn’t play his guitar again or his uncle’s harmonica. 

 

Sure, Brian was being nice but the longing for home didn’t cease, perhaps it never would. 

 

* * *

 

The next day, John was out in the balcony. The day was fairly warm and so he was wearing just a long robe after a long shower. The house was surrounded by forest, tall green trees staring up at him. Vaguely, he could see the Liver Building in the distance, reminding him even more of home. All those places he’d passed by for years, yet never appreciated. He was smoking a cigarette from the pack Mal had gifted to him. 

 

He heard the door open and the click of designer shoes. John let the smoke out as Brian went into the balcony. 

 

“Enjoying the view?” Brian asked in an amicable tone.

 

John took a drag, “I can see home from here.”

 

“...yes.” There was an awkward silence. 

 

John sighed and turned around, “Am I going out today?”

 

Brian smiled, “I had hope you would join me in feeding the ducks.” He sounded hopeful.

 

John stared at him then at Liverpool. He snuffed out his fag and nodded, “Alright then. Let me get dressed.”

Half an hour later, John and Brian were outside. John had decided to wear the white suit again, but he’d left his feet in slippers. Out of the new jewelry collection, he’d decided to wear a shiny pair of diamond earrings and nothing else. He was wearing his glasses too, to better admire the ducks. 

 

A maid had given them each a small bag of food for ducks and for the koi fish also found in the large pond. 

 

Seeing John’s interested gaze, Brian spoke up, “I had them imported from Japan.”

 

John looked up, “I’ve never left Britain.” He shared, “I used to visit Scotland every summer but I haven’t in a while.”

 

Brian stared at him, then he said, “I would take you anywhere and everywhere in the world.”

 

John scoffed and threw birdseed at him, “Don’t tease.”

 

They continued walking around the pond in silence for a few more minutes.

 

Finally, the mobster asked, “Did you like the jewelry?”

 

John’s face was overcome by a sudden smile as he reached up to touch the earrings, “Can I really wear it all?” He’d never received such a gift. 

 

Brian grinned, “Of course! It’s a shame they’ve been gathering dust for all these years.” No one had seemed worthy of them before John.

 

John looked down with narrowed eyes. “Will I..have an occasion to wear them soon?” It would be boring to wear them just around his room like a doll.

 

Brian’s eyes were hopeful, “How do you feel about dancing?”

 

John laughed, “Me aunty says I dance like a headless chicken.” She wasn’t wrong.

 

Brian threw some seed to the fish, “In two weeks time I will be hosting a dance here, it’s an annual gathering of all the prominent mafioso families allied to me.” He looked at John, “I would like for you to attend.”

 

The student wasn’t particularly eager to be surrounded by even more mobsters and assassins. “I don’t know about that.” He said. 

 

“At least think about it.” Brian winked, “I can teach you to dance.”

 

John sighed but smiled at the fish, “I wouldn’t mind learning to dance.” He’d always been jealous of boys like Ringo who could take control of the dancefloor. 

 

Brian seemed glad, “Brilliant! I’ll go to your room tonight, we’ll start right away.”

 

And that’s how John found himself with Brian’s hand on his waist, stumbling around in his pajamas. “Ah, shit!” He yelled as he once again stepped on Brian’s slipper clad feet. 

 

Brian shrugged, “That’s fine, you’re doing fine.” John was doing terrible.

 

John’s hand on the older man’s shoulder tightened as he nearly tripped, again. “I’m shit at this.”

 

“So was I at some point.” Reassured Brian. Hearing John’s scoff, he kept going, “It’s true. My mother taught me to dance when I was twelve, I wasn’t good at it until I turned eighteen.”

 

John stared at him. 

 

Brian frowned, “What is it?”

 

“I can’t imagine you as a kid.” The student said, “You seem too put together to have been a kid or a teenager.”

 

Brian laughed and adjusted his grip on the boy. “Believe me, I was not put together as a child. I was messy, uncoordinated, unrefined…”

 

“So all the things that I am now.” John said. 

 

“Don’t say that.” Brian tutted, “You’re beautiful.”

 

John blushed, “No one’s ever said that to me before you.” Beautiful wasn’t a word used to describe blokes in Liverpool, much less boys like John. 

 

Brian smiled gently, “Well, it’s true.”

 

John dared to smile back, “Thanks, Eppy.”

 

The mobster frowned, “Pardon?”

 

John shrugged, “Yeah. Eppy. Short for Epstein.”

 

“But why?” 

 

Laughing at the baffled look in the other man’s face, John said, “Because it’s personal.” He explained. “Don Epstein is your mobster name and Brian is just, just a name. Eppy is from me.” John gave all of his friends special nicknames. Paul was Macca (only John could call him that), George was Hazza, Ringo was Ringy (that was very creative), etc. If he was never going to see them again, he might as well nickname the one person he was going to see.

 

Brian found himself charmed by the name and smiled, “That’s...thank you.”

 

John looked at the ground and shrugged, “Just thought you might like it.”

 

“I do.” Brian squeezed the hand he was holding. 

 

John let out a breath, “Shall we keep practicing?”

 

Eppy started moving again, “Certainly.”

* * *

 

It was a few days later and the clothes had arrived. John had been brushing his hair when Mal and his men had entered the room buried in bags and boxes. 

 

John gaped, “All this?”

 

Mal groaned as he put down his load, “All this.”

 

John started to open the bags and boxes. There were suits of a million colours, blouses, jackets, blazers, jumpers, vests, more pajamas, sleep robes, bathrobes, berets, scarves, gloves, neckties, ties, bowties, boots, dress shoes...enough to dress an army. A very fashionable army. Still, “No jeans?” John asked with a raised eyebrow.

 

Mal shrugged sheepishly, “Guess not.” He cleared his throat, “Boss called me, he said he wants you to join him and the others for dinner.”

 

John froze as he held up a wool cape, “Brown?” He asked in a trembling voice.

 

The other man’s voice was angry, “No. He’s out of town.”

 

John relaxed, “Okay then.” Dinner with other people wouldn’t hurt, Ono would probably be there.

 

“Fancy dress.” Mal said, “And, uh, he asked that you wear red?”

 

John hummed to himself and smirked as he reached another suit bag, “Very well.” He held the suit up, yes, it would do very nicely.

 

* * *

 

John admired himself in the mirror, admiring how the light glinted off the large necklace he’d chosen. The suit was a dark red, crimson, with form fitting trousers that flared at the bottom. He’d decided, self-indulgently, to forgone a shirt and just wear the matching blazer. For the first time, he was actually thankful for the lack of hair in his body. He leaned towards the mirror and ruffled his hair, it was growing longer and the culs were beginning to show. Truth was, he wanted to make an impression upon Eppy’s friends/colleagues/whatever they were, better than that breakfast. He didn’t want to be the subject of ridicule and as such, he was going to blow them away. 

 

He was grumbling to O’Boogie about how long his pointy nose looked when the door opened and Mal walked in.

 

“It’s time- oh.” Mal stared.

 

John did a spin and then offered him a goofy face, “How do I look?”

 

Mal chuckled, “Are you kidding? Fuckin’ amazing, John. The boss won’t be able to keep his hands off you!”

 

John faltered. Was that how Brian would take it? John wasn’t looking for anything like that, he just wanted to show off his new clothes and look good. He’d never been able to do that before, that was it. He wasn’t trying to seduce anyone, certainly not Epstein. His smile fell slightly, “Yeah, well.” 

 

Mal smiled, “Are you ready?”

 

John grabbed his cat and kissed his forehead, “As I’ll ever be.”

 

* * *

 

John’s shoes clicked on the floor as he went down the stairs. Brian and his associated were drinking downstairs, but all conversation ceased as John came into view. 

 

Seeing his friends’ eyebrows raise, Brian turned around and gasped. 

 

John gathered his courage and walked towards him with confidence. Once he reached the mobster, John took his glass from him and took a sip for himself, “Hey, Eppy.” 

 

Ignoring the confused looks he was getting, Brian cleared his throat, “I, eh...Hello, John. You look marvelous.” His tailor really was a talented man. And those diamonds...they belonged on John’s neck and no one else's.

 

John had an urge to flip his hair, that is, if he had hair long enough. Instead he just tilted his head, “Do I?” This confidence was liberating. 

 

Brian grinned at him and started to introduce him, keeping a hand gently on John’s back. “You know Ono, but meet Eastman-” The young blonde he’d seen before nodded, “-best aim in Britain.” They moved in front of the tall blond man, “Martin, my consigliere.” And then they reached a shorter man with glasses John hadn’t seen before. Brian spoke, “This is Mr. Taylor, lawyer and dear friend.”

 

John shook all their hands, not entirely sure how he felt about all these mobsters and, and assassins. He’d rather not think about it. 

 

Still, dinner was terrific. The food was mouthwatering and the conversation upbeat. Brian kept trying to make John laugh, attempting to hear those dulcet tones, and succeeding. It was after a particularly riveting story of a rat in a bicycle that Eastman spoke up. 

 

She took a sip of her wine, “I see you’ve settled in, Lennon.”

 

John didn’t care for her cold tone. He shrugged, “I try.”

 

Brian looked almost giddy, “We fed the ducks a few days ago.”

 

Martin chuckled, “Good. They needed it.”

 

They talked amongst themselves, John interjecting witty comments to make Brian laugh and Ono grin, and by the time they got to dessert John was feeling relaxed. It was then that Sh-Boom came on the radio and John perked up, “I love this!” He exclaimed. 

 

Brian listened for a brief moments and then, to the astonishment of his coworkers, stood up and offered a hand, “Come then, let’s dance.”

 

John wasted no time in taking the hand and letting himself be lead to the brief space next to the large radio and fireplace. 

 

They got into position and Brian started to lead the dance, slightly more upbeat than usual.

 

John started to sing along, “ _ Life could be a dream, sweetheart. _ ” He winked for good measure.

 

The others stared in amazement as their usually cold blooded boss twirled the young man around and laughed freely. 

 

_ “Sh-Boom, oh tell me darling I’m the only one that you love.”  _ John let a giggle escape as he was dipped repeatedly. He fell into Brian’s chest, forgetting all of his problems for the moment. 

 

Brian smiled down at him and they continued to spin around, nearly hitting a lamp. John’s laughter echoed throughout the room. 

 

* * *

 

Afterwards, John and Brian were upstairs, still laughing about their dance. 

 

“It wasn’t bad.” Brian was saying, “I’ve taught you well.”

 

John was grinning, “I know.” 

 

Before they turned into the hallway that led to his room; however, Brian grabbed his hand. “Wait,” He said, “I have something to show you.”

 

John frowned, “What is it?”

 

“Come on.” Brian sounded excited. 

 

John was led in the opposite direction until they reached a large pair of wooden doors, Brian smiled as he opened them. John stepped into the room and gasped, it was a library. Rows and rows of bookshelves, at least two fireplaces, and a dozen small sofas. Unlike the rest of the house, it looked cozy and friendly. 

 

Brian was looking at him fondly, “I imagine you’re getting tired of the same three books.”

 

John turned to him, “Oh, Eppy, this is…” He sighed. Never had he been inside such a big library. The Art College didn’t have one and all the other bookstores around Liverpool were small and more commercial than good. 

 

The older man took out a cigar and started to light it, “I ask that you don’t go downstairs, but you can leave your room, come here, wonder the upper floors…” He left it open. 

 

John stared at him, “Really?”

 

Brian reddened under the look, “I, I don’t want you to feel like a prisoner.”

 

But I am a prisoner, John thought of saying. But it didn’t seem right to ruin the mood. Brian had been kind, fun, he was a better man than John had thought. “Alright, then.” John said instead. 

 

They left the library and headed towards John’s room, their shoes clicking in unison. They reached his door and John opened it. 

 

Brian straightened himself, “Well, I hope you enjoyed yourself tonight. I’ll let you rest now, John.”

 

But before he could leave, John reached out to grab his arm, “Wait.”

 

Brian turned, “Yes?”

 

John was blushing slightly, but still he stepped forwards and leaned close to put a small kiss on the mobster’s cheek. “Goodnight.” He said with a goofy smile as he closed the door, leaving a speechless man behind. 

 

* * *

 

Eastman found John in the library a few days later, staring out the window with a thick book in his lap and glasses crooked on his nose. She spoke up, “Lennon?”

 

The student jumped, “Oh, it’s you. Hey.”

 

She tilted her head, “You’re not reading.”

 

John stared at her, “No.” He said. “I was just…” He pointed out the window, “Liverpool.”

 

Her tone held a semblance of emotion now, “You miss home.”

 

He chuckled, “Obviously.”

 

She sat down in front of him, “You seemed happy with Don Brian.”

 

“I was. Am.” John answered, “But I’m a prisoner, aren’t I?”

 

Linda thought for a moment. “I’m sure,” She started, “that if you asked he might let you see your family or a friend.”

 

John sighed, “You really think so?”

 

“I don’t know.” She said, also looking out the window. “You bring something out in him, something new.” She stood up and left without another word. 

 

He was left staring after her, an idea forming in his mind. 

 

* * *

 

“So, have you decided if you’re going to the dance or not?” Brian asked, cutting his meat. 

 

It was a week before the dance and they were having dinner. John was wearing a blue suit tonight, with the white shirt unbuttoned at the top and a blue necktie around his neck. 

 

He hummed, “I’ll go...if you let me visit my aunt.”

 

Brian dropped his fork. He looked up at John, “...what?”

 

John was not about to be deterred, “She must be worried sick! I want her to know I’m okay.”

 

Brian shook his head, “I don’t think so.”

 

John kept going, “I miss her. She’s never been alone-”

 

“She is not longer your concern.” Brian’s tone was firm with a touch of irritation. 

 

John gasped, “Of course she is! She’s me fuckin’ aunt!”

 

Brian slammed his wine glass down, making some of the liquid spill out. “I said no!” He yelled across the table. 

 

John felt silent. He took a deep breath and nodded, then stood. “I’m not hungry.” He left the table and the room, going upstairs to lock himself away in his room.

 

Brian was left behind, after a few moments he too stood up and ran a hand through his hair, messing it up. “Dammit.” He whispered.

 

* * *

 

The next day was rainy, yet John was still out in the balcony having a smoke. His sleep had been bad and there were bags under his eyes. He rolled his eyes when he heard the click of Brian’s shoes, “What do you want?”

 

The older man’s voice was low, “I have something for you.”

 

John sighed, “Yippee…”

 

“I thought you might like to wear it to the dance.”

 

John turned around with a huff, “I told you, I’m not going unless-”

 

“Mal will accompany you.” Brian interrupted swiftly.

 

John’s brow furrowed, “Eh?”

 

Brian had a twinkle in his eye, “To visit your aunt. Tomorrow.” He offered a shy smile, “You’ll have two hours, can’t risk more.”

 

John wondered what risk he was talking about. He felt excited, but also disappointed. Two hours after weeks? Still, it would do no good to complain. “That’s fine.” He didn’t thank Brian, it was the least the man should do.

 

Satisfied, Brian held up the bag, “Would you like to see it?”

 

John let his cigarette fall, “Yeah, sure.”

 

They walked inside, Brian closing the doors after O’Boogie had entered. “Go stand in front of the mirror.” He instructed, “And close your eyes.”

 

John scoffed but did as told, feeling a stirring of curiosity. Soon, he felt Brian press against his back and an article of clothing put against his front. John took a deep breath at the close contact. 

 

“Open them.” Brian said in a low voice. 

 

John did as told and gasped. It was a dress. A deep black dress with the shoulders exposed, a long fishtail skirt with a slit in the front, and a clear black train hanging from the shoulders downwards. He had no words. 

 

“Hold it.” Brian said and John obeyed. 

 

The older man took a hold of the cloth covering John’s shoulders, slowly pushing it down to reveal the pale and freckled skin, his breaths ghosting over it. 

 

John swallowed at the intimate gesture. He looked into the mirror, seeing how the dress would look on him.

 

“I had my tailor do this one especially.” Brian’s voice was a hoarse whisper, “Do you like it?”

 

After a few heavy seconds, John found his voice, “I think...I’ll need gloves to go with it.”

 

Eppy rewarded him with a smile.

 

* * *

 

John was vibrating with excitement. He’d dressed nicely in a grey suit, hoping to impress Mimi with his change in style. He would be visiting her today and he couldn’t wait to see her.

 

Brian was at the door when he reached the landing and John kissed his cheek before walking out the door, to show his appreciation. He supposed, considering everything, this was a nice gesture of the mobster’s. 

 

Brian turned to Mal, “Keep him safe.”

 

John huffed, “I’ll be alright. I don’t know why you two are so worried.”

 

Mal and Brian shared an unreadable look. 

 

They left the mansion, John in the backseat of a car with tinted windows that stopped him from looking outside and the partition was up, so he couldn’t see from the driver’s window either. Still, the car stopped soon enough and Mal opened the door with a kind smile, “Here we are, 251 Menlove Avenue.”

 

John grinned as he got out of the car, running an anxious hand through his hair. He looked around, it was early and there didn’t seem to be anyone outside. He breathed in the familiar air and almost teared up as he looked at Mimi’s house. He was home. 

 

When the door opened, John’s eyes widened at the state of the woman that did so. Mimi Smith looked more tired and older than ever before, but her eyes gained life as they laid on him.

 

John smiled softly, “Hey Mimi.”

 

“J-John!” She gasped and soon enough they were holding each other close, wrapping each other in a warm hug. They didn’t hug usually, it wasn’t in their nature, but what else could they do at the moment. 

 

When the hug ended, Mimi’s gaze turned to the tall man behind her nephew.

 

John spoke up, “This is Mal Evans.”

 

The henchman nodded, “M’am.”

 

Mimi frowned but waved them inside. Mal stayed in the hallway as the two of them went into the kitchen. She seemed to be in shock as she prepared tea, not speaking. John sat on the kitchen table and stared at her, waiting for her to regain her senses. 

 

It after they each had had a sip of their tea that Mimi’s dam burst, “Where on Earth have you been!?”

 

John looked at the mantle, “I can’t tell you.”

 

She looked outraged, “Why not?”

 

“Mimi, please. Trust me.” John tried. 

 

She scoffed, “Everyone’s been worried, you’ve been missing for weeks! They found your guitar, your glasses...I thought the worst.”

 

John grabbed her hand, “I’m right here, Mims. I’m okay.” 

 

“But why were you gone?” She demanded. 

 

He sighed, “It’s...complicated.” He looked at her, “I didn’t want to leave though, okay? I promise.”

 

She put her head in her hands, “I don’t understand.”

 

He chuckled, “Sometimes I don’t either.” He grabbed his tea, “But please, how are my friends? How’s Paul?”

 

She started talking. Paul had been worried sick, refusing to play gigs without John. George had been looking thinner than usual and Ringo’s eyes were even sadder. Stuart had brought John’s things from their flat, just for something to do. He’d sworn that some things were missing, a few books and John’s extra glasses. Also, O’Boogie was missing. 

 

John spoke up then, “No, he’s fine. I’ve got him.”

 

She frowned, “What? How?”

 

“Don’t worry about it.” John reassured, “He’s doing better than ever.”

 

She still didn’t understand but kept going. His family had all been called, showing worry but mostly apathy since John wasn’t close to any of them. The police were looking for him but had found no leads. John scoffed at that, they would never find Eppy. Then frowned at himself for the thought. 

 

The two hours passed too fast and soon Mal was entering the kitchen, “It’s time to go, John.” His tone was regretful. 

 

John’s mood turned sour. He turned to Mimi, “Could I get some of my things?”

 

She stood up, “Yes, yes of course.”

 

John went upstairs alone, needing to collect himself. He went into his small room, now littered with stuff from the apartment, and sighed. Slowly, he grabbed a bag and started to grab things. His leather jacket, two pairs of jeans (Eppy hadn’t changed his style that permanently yet), a picture of him and Julian when he was a kid, a picture of the Beatles all smiling with their instruments, and a picture of him with Uncle George and Mimi. Finally, he spotted his guitar close to his bed and grabbed the case. He saw the boxes containing his meds and laughed slightly, he certainly didn’t need to take those. There were still many remaining from Brian’s supply.

 

Leaving was harder than he thought. Mimi was next to the door, practically in tears. “I just,” She was saying, “I don’t understand why you have to leave?”

 

John held her close, “I’ll try to come back, okay?” He closed his eyes, “I promise.”

 

She ran a motherly hand down his hair, “Take care, please.”

 

Finally, he left. His eyes teared up as Mal put his stuff in the trunk and he allowed a tear to fall as soon as the partition was up and the car started. He did his best to keep the sobs quiet.

 

He failed.

 

* * *

 

John had calmed down by the time they entered the mansion, Mal bumping his shoulder to cheer him up. But they both frowned as they spotted Brian and Brown fighting in the living room. 

 

The voices ceased as they took in the two men that had just entered and Brown directed a lustful leer in John’s direction. 

 

The young man winced, grabbed his guitar from Mal’s hand, and practically ran up the stairs. The bodyguard scowled at Brown and left as well. 

 

That night John was plucking away at his guitar when he heard Brian walk past his door. He almost hoped that the man would stop and talk to John, but the steps came and went. So he put his guitar down, grabbed his robe, and headed out. He went to the other’s door and knocked lightly, “Eppy?”

 

“...come in, John.” The man sounded tired. 

 

John walked in to see Brian enter the bathroom and heard his brushing his teeth quickly. The mobster was already wearing his silk pajamas. He looked tense as he sat down on his bed. 

 

John felt worry creep in. He walked close, “Lay down.” He said, “I’ll give you a massage.” Julia did it for her boyfriend a lot, and she’d taught John to do it ‘for his wife.’ Look at me now, mum, John thought. 

 

Brian needed no more insensitive to do as told. 

 

John rolled up his sleeves and got to work, kneading Eppy’s shoulders and back. The older man groaned and hummed as John worked, the tension slowly dissipating from his body. 

 

John spoke up, “What happened? What’s wrong?”

 

Brian sighed into the pillow, “It’s Sullivan. We still don’t know where he is. Brown, oh, Brown thinks he’s working with the Jagger Family. They’re Londoners and close friends.” He closed his eyes, “They wouldn’t betray me.”

 

John did his best to stop his hands from tensing as Brown was mentioned. He worked on a particularly tense spot, “Could you ask them?”

 

Brian hummed, “They’re sending a representative to the dance, I hope to gain more information then.”

 

After a few more moments, John stopped his movements. He stepped away, “Better?”

 

Brian turned on his side and offered a soft smile, “Yes, thank you.” He rubbed his hands, “How was your aunt?”

 

John started to talk excitedly, “Happy to see I’m okay. We talked about my friends, the family, O’Boogie.” He laughed and sat down on the edge of the bed, “She told me some gossip about the neighbors, typical Mimi.” His tone turned cautious, “I, eh, told her I’d try to visit her soon.”

 

Brian decided he loved John’s smile and would do his best to keep it there. “I’m sure Mal won’t mind taking you.” He sighed, “Things are tense right now, so it can’t happen every week but…” 

 

John shrugged, “It’s fine.” He took Brian’s hand and squeezed it.

 

Eppy brought it up to his mouth and placed a kiss on it. “Stay here tonight.” He said.

 

John tensed.

 

“Please.” Said Brian, sitting up straighter. “Trust me, John. Stay.”

 

“...okay.” John said. He stood and removed his robe as he walked towards the other side of the bed. He stopped as he reached it though, “You removed the cuffs.” He observed with a smile. 

 

Brian looked ashamed, “I did.”

 

John was more relaxed as he lied down and got under the covers. He gasped as Brian hugged him from behind, spooning the younger man. 

 

“Is this okay?” Brian whispered. 

 

John took a few deep breaths, “Yes.” He said. This was Brian, not Brown. He willed the tension away, “I’m okay.”

 

Brian placed a chaste kiss on his  neck, “Goodnight.”

 

They fell asleep like that.

 

* * *

 

At last, it was the day of the dance. John was in the closet going through his jewelry. He needed something not too big but good enough to catch attention. He got out two different necklaces and set them on a table. Then he turned to look at the dress. Giggling, he picked it up and held it to his chest, then he started to twirl around, watching it swish. 

 

“Morning.” Came an amused voice.

 

John jumped and nearly dropped the dress, “Eppy!”

 

Brian chuckled with a fond smile, “I’m sorry.” He said. He held up a box, “I have your gloves.”

 

“Ah, great.” John took the box, paused to place a fast kiss on Eppy’s cheek as thanks, then peeked inside to see the long white gloves. “Are you nervous?”

 

Brian shook his head and reached up to play with a lock of John’s hair, “Not really, I’ll have you by my side.”

 

John hit him with the box, “Flatterer.” Still, he was blushing. He put the box down and picked up the two necklaces, “Purple or blue?” He asked.

 

Immediately Brian answered, “Blue. The topazes will look wonderful on you.”

 

John put the blue gem back with its set and put the purple gems away. “Ta.”

 

Brian looked at his watch, “I have some business to attend to, I’m afraid. I’ll see you tonight.”

 

John waved him away, “Bye, Eppy.”

 

* * *

 

John was looking at himself in the mirror. The dress was tailored for him, for a man, and so it fit perfectly. His shoulders were on display and the long satin gloves made his arms appear longer. The black flats he’d chosen to wear fit him well and a firm leg could be seen through the slit of the skirt. All in all, he looked good. But the fact remained that he was a man wearing a dress and he was about to be seen by dozens of people. What would they think? Would the laugh at him? He could hear the music and laughter from downstairs and it didn’t help with his nerves.

 

The door opened and Ono entered, she was wearing an orange velvet suit. 

 

John blushed under her stare, “What do you think?”

 

Her eyes narrowed, “There’s something missing.” She pointed at the vanity, “Sit down.”

 

He did as told and stayed still as she revealed a small bag. Trembling, he allowed her to put mascara on him but did flinch when she got the lipstick out.

 

She rolled her eyes, “You have a small mouth, it needs to stand out.”

 

John frowned but figured she knew best, so he purses his lips and allowed the dark red-brown colour to be applied. He pressed his lips together when instructed and rubbed his gloved hands together, “Am I done?”

 

She brought her hands up and messed with his hair slightly, parting to one side. “Yes, you’re done.”

 

He stood up and they left the room. He took deep breaths as they walked, feeling slightly faint. Was this how women felt at parties? Damn.

 

Much like last time, all conversation ceased as John entered the living room. He stood straight, thankful for the fact that everything was fucking blurry and he couldn’t see anyone’s judging looks.

 

Brian appeared in front of him, an amazed look in his face. He offered a hand, “May I have this dance?”

 

John took a breath and smirked, “Yeah okay.” He let Brian lead him into the dance floor. The music picked up and Brian smiled at him as he started to lead. 

 

He was thankful that Brian didn’t start a conversation because John was having a hard time remembering all the steps, but he managed to get by. He didn’t want to mess this up and embarrass them both with everyone looking. He kept his eyes firmly on Brian’s face, ignoring their surroundings. John didn’t even flinch when Brian dipped him, he just held on tightly and smiled. 

 

Brian looked happy as he twirled Lennon, Linda observed. The mob boss had never invited any of his pets to a dance, never got them so many clothes and jewelry...it didn’t make sense. What was it about that boy that had Brian so enchanted? His looks? Linda admitted he was handsome, but not the best boss had had. His attitude? Cocky and disrespectful, Epstein had killed men for less. Ono liked him and so did Mal, perhaps Linda should get closer to him and get to know him. It did appear that the boy was here to stay. 

 

The audience clapped once they were done and John gave Brian a giddy smile. He was proud of himself for not messing up. Brian squeezed his hand, proud as well. The mobster led John to the bar as other people got on the dance floor, nodding at people along the way. John didn’t acknowledge them, their gazes seeming intrusive and mocking. 

 

Brian turned to John, “Drink?”

 

Twenty, thought John. He nodded eagerly, “Scotch and coke, ta.”

 

Brian hailed his bartender and ordered John’s drink and a martini for himself. Then he looked over John’s figure, “You look stunning.”

 

John grabbed his drink, “Thanks.” He’d sat himself down on a stool and his bare leg was on full show. He thought of adjusting his position but figured this was not a time to be self-conscious. 

 

A thin man with square face appeared, “‘ello there, Don Epstein!” He sounded like a Londoner. 

 

Brian shook his hand and spoke to John, “John, this is Michael Jagger from London.” Then with a satisfied smirk, “Michael, this is John Lennon.”

 

John offered his gloved hand to shake but raised an eyebrow as the man took it and raised it to his lips, kissing it instead. 

 

“Call me Mick, please.” He said with a charming smile. Then, without waiting for a response, he turned to Brian with a snigger, “Where do you find these boys, Brian? They’re gorgeous!”

 

John’s smile fell. He was abruptly reminded that he wasn’t special. Brian had had dozens like him, would have dozens more after John...left? Brian wouldn’t let him leave, would he? He turned away from the conversation. All the clothes, the jewels...he’d done the same thing for a million other boys like John, to flatter them and manipulate them. Because that’s what mobsters did. 

 

Brian touched his arm, “John, excuse me, would you?”

 

John forced a smile, “Sure.”

 

He was left alone, wallowing in self-pity. He could feel people’ stares, some hungry and others disgusted. Of course there were bigots in the mafia. He turned to observe the room, crossing his legs to avoid people looking where they shouldn’t. He smirked as he spotted an elderly woman glaring at her husband for gaping at John in lust. She wasn’t alone. 

 

There were also some women looking at him in appreciation, but most of them seemed confused and upset. John was taking all the spotlight and it cheered him up. 

 

A crude voice came from behind him, “You look absolutely ravishing.”

 

John gasped and turned around, dropping his drink on the table. 

 

Brown leered at him, “You seemed shocked to see me.”

 

John couldn’t speak, the blood rushing in his ears. He could feel himself shaking all over. 

 

“It’s nice to see you finally in your place.” Brown was leaning towards him, much too close. 

 

John gulped, “Le-eave me alone.” His voice sounded weak even to his ears. 

 

Brown laughed, “You don’t want to make a scene, do you? Brian will be frightfully upset with you if you ruin his night.”

 

John was curled up into himself, “What do you want?”

 

“Dance with me.”

 

John scoffed, “Fuck off.” He stood up and started to move away. 

 

But Brown grabbed his arm in a painful grip, “I don’t think so.”

 

John winced, “Let me go.” He pulled but whimpered as the grip was tightened. 

 

Brown dragged him close, “Listen, you little bitch You’re going to dance with me or I’ll make sure Brian-”

 

“Brian what?” Came a polished voice. 

 

John gasped in relief and moved to Eppy’s side as soon as Brown’s grip loosened. Brian placed a protective hand on his back but immediately moved it away after John flinched. 

 

Brian’s eyes were narrowed, “What were you doing, Peter?”

 

Brown laughed, the whole room’s eyes on him. “Just admiring the goods, boss.”

 

Brian’s smile was cold. “Really? Not the only goods you’ve been examining, right?”

 

Brown frowned nervously, “Eh?”

 

Brian pointed to Mick, who waved happily. “I’ve been talking to Jagger and he had so many interesting things to say, about you….and Sullivan. “

 

  
“Boss, I-”

 

Brian’s tone was vicious, enraged, “It was you who stole the pounds of cocaine, the one behind the meth delays. What, hoping to make some money on the side?” He scoffed, “Did you really think you would be able to fool me for long?” He was up in Brown’s face, “We have much to discuss.” He snapped his fingers and Mal appeared with his men. 

 

Mal grabbed Brown’s shoulder, “The jig is up, shitface.”

 

Brown then lunged himself at Don Epstein, but Mal held him back and started to drag him away. “YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS.” He screamed as people moved away to avoid him, “YOU AND YOUR BITCH.”

 

John looked away from him, taking a random drink from the bar and downing it. 

 

Once Brown was away, there was silence. But slowly people started to clap, with Mick adding in a whoop. John, seeing how tense Brian was, squeezed his shoulder and offered a small smile. Brian smiled back. 

 

The mob boss took a deep breath and collected himself. He grinned wildly and said, “Let’s start the music again, shall we?”

 

People cheered.

 

* * *

 

Afterwards, John and Eppy were outside John’s bedroom. John had a smile in his face. He and Brian had danced again, then Mick had taken John for a spin, a very wild spin that made the dress flare out, then a man called Bowie had arrived and danced with John as well. Brian had stopped others after that, saying that John was his date and no one else’s. 

 

“Did you enjoy the dance?” Brian asked. 

 

John ran a hand down the length of the dress, still wired. “Everyone was staring at me.” He laughed.

 

“I know.” Brian sounded jealous. “You looked”- he sighed- “Wonderful.”

 

John did a curtsy, “Why, thank you.” Then he looked down, mood somber, “For getting rid of Brown, too.”

 

Eppy’s eyes were guilty, “I should have done so long ago.”

 

John couldn’t disagree, “Probably.”

 

They laughed. 

 

Brian clapped his hands, “Well, I’ll let you catch some rest. Goodnight.”

 

But John stepped close and, after letting out a shaking breath, put a gloved hand on Eppy’s face. 

 

Brian swallowed, “John?” Expecting another kiss on the cheek, Brian was surprised when John’s lips met his instead. 

 

The kiss was chaste and soon John was moving away. But Brian put his hands on his hips and brought him back, kissing him with a passion. John moaned as Brian’s tongue slipped in and he put his arms around Brian, needing to feel him close. They didn’t stop until they were both out of breath. 

 

John was gasping. Shit, he thought. That was the best kiss he’d ever had. 

 

Brian was thinking the same thing. He leaned to press another kiss against John’s lips, this one shorter but no less passionate. “Goodnight, darling.” And he was gone, a jump in his step.

 

John raised a hand to his lips and smiled. He went into his room, giddy. Everything was going to be okay.

  
  
  
  


 

Right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a kudo would be awesome and a comment even better!


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